tug of war

THIS LOVE I HAVE FOR YOU IS LIKE TUG OF WAR. ONE DAY I WANT YOU HERE, NOT TO LEAVE MY SIDE I WANT US TO BREATHE THE SAME AIR. THEN THERE ARE DAYS I WANT YOU TO LEAVE ME ALONE AND GIVE ME BACK MY PERSONAL SPACE. BUT IT DOESN'T MEAN I STOPPED LOVING YOU BECAUSE I STILL DO. I AM STILL TRYING TO FIGURE OUT HOW TO LOVE BUT YET I KNOW THAT THESE EMOTIONS FOR YOU ARE ABSOLUTELY LOVE. YOUR SMILE BRIGHTENS MY DAY MAKES ME HAPPY KNOWING I'M THAT ONE WHO PUT THAT SMILE ON YOUR FACE. HUGGING YOU, YOU EMBRACE ME MAKING ME FEEL SAFE AND WARM. FEELING UNTOUCHABLE TO THE OUTSIDE WORLD. WHEN I'M BY YOUR SIDE I FEEL LIKE IT'S US AGAINST THE WORLD. MY WORRIES DISAPPEAR AND WHAT IS MY FEAR? FEAR OF LOSING YOU PUSHING YOU TO FAR AWAY THAT NOT EVEN LOVE WILL MAKE YOU STAY. I DON'T KNOW HOW TO WANT YOU EVERY DAY I DON'T NO HOW TO LET LOVING SOMEONE ELSE NOT OVERWHELM ME. FEARS OF OPENING UP FEARS OF GETTING MY HEART ONCE AGAIN HURT. SO I PUT UP A WALL, YET I WANT YOU TO OPEN UP AND BARE IT ALL. TUG OF WAR NOT WITH JUST YOU BUT MYSELF TOO. WHEN I WANT YOU I EXPECT FOR YOU TO CALL OR FOR YOU TO ANSWER THE PHONE. I WANT TO BE SURPRISED FOR YOU TO OVER FLOOD ME WITH GIFTS AND YOUR FULL ATTENTION. TUG OF WAR WITH HOLDING ON TO YOU BECAUSE I CAN'T BARE TO SEE SOMEONE ELSE IN YOUR ARMS. TUG OF WAR BECAUSE I CAN'T STAND THE THOUGHT OF YOU NOT PLANNING THIS FUTURE WITH YOU ANYMORE. I JUST WANT HAPPINESS BUT THERE'S THOSE DAYS I DISAPPOINTMENT MYSELF AND I'M ASHAMED TO FACE THE LOOK OF SOMEONE ELSE. CAN YOU LOVE ME THROUGH MY FLAWS IF SO I'M WILLING O RISK AND BARE IT ALL.