3 AM

3 IN THE MORNING

It's 3 in the morning, I'm tired but can't sleep, theirs is too much on my mind. Much more then I can keep.

I can close my eyes, but still hear every peep. I have fallen so far deep, that it's keeping me from sleep.

I sit here and think, how did I get this far? Was it the drugs or the alcohol? Or my emotional brick wall?

I have a constant fight with myself, to do it again or not, I've let many people down, I wish I could stop.

There is so much that we think we know, but people have a side they never show. 

I accuse my past for what I am now, but I cannot blame, the decisions I have made, that ended me in this dark cave.

We try to escape responsibility, but we must face the consequences of our past stupidity.

Where we are now is because of what we have done, and to run away from it would be cowardly and dumb.

I complain of the state of my life today, but I must realize it is a gift given with grace. 

They say each human is tailored in a specific way, that we can undergo the challenges god has set for us years away.

If we slow down we realize, how much we miss. Everything around us is an amazing gift.

To dwell on the fact that not everything is great, will only make you more and more irate.

We all have life goals, goals that we were made to accomplish, we have to focus on the future, and fight through all the hardship.

People say "where is god when I need him," they protest, but never forget, the teacher is quiet during the test.

We have so much to live for, yet some people wish they could die, open up your eyes, and see the world without the filter you apply.

It's now 4 in the morning, still wishing I could sleep, but I'm glad I wrote this little piece. 

One day I will be able look back and say, "damn, i came a pretty long way"