Every Color

Everytime my heart breaks I dye my hair a different color.

Today I couldn’t tell you how many different tones I’ve styled,

But I know with each one comes a new “me”.

right now I’m burgundy,

Edgy, risky,

young, wild, and free.

This shade came after a final goodbye to my longtime lover,

And a couple of temporary replacements who used, lied, and manipulated.

Burgundy is headstrong,

She is determined and doesn’t deal with your bullshit.

She’s blunt, but if you get to know her she’s kindhearted.

But like everyone else;

She’s fake.

She’s a marionette,

Her strings being pulled through actions and a life she’s only half aware of.

In the dark at night, laying in bed,

Unable to see the pigment of stain on her strands of hair,

She forgets all of this and doesn’t know who it is that she is,

She’s filled with loss and numbness to herself and the life she leads.

A gentle, quiet purple?

A blonde who’s sweet until you get a rise out of her,

A bubblegum pink, who wears studded jackets and breaks boys hearts.

A coffee-brunette who tells the funniest jokes,

Or a bubbly, talented teal?

These masks hide me from the real me,

The me someone fell in and out of love with-

The one who wasn’t enough for love.

And when every color stops being enough,

A new me emerges,

But to be honest..

I yearn to be that dirty blonde, with messy hair, and a crooked smile.

I long to be me again.