Worth

you allow yourself to love someone
that hurts you so much
you feel alone
does it not work as such
making reasonable decisions becomes less important as long as you get to lay your head with them one last night
you dont know
all you know is that it hurts
when its good
it hurts for the fear of losing what you have
becoming a person you wouldve never imagined
a liar
drifting farther from your real morals 

you ask yourself is it that the heart likes the sorrow i am bringing or my self-conscious 

am i testing myself and if so 

how will it result