The plains are gloomy,
And the night is cold.
More stars are shining,
Then the sky could hold.
The moon was shining,
As bright as the sun.
And if the moon was shown,
You know that night begun.
The moon reflects the sun,
The light that shines so bright.
And sends it to our earth,
To light up our night.
And when the light,
Shines over plains and dunes.
We will always know,
We have our shining moon.
But when the moon sits,
Under the mountains and hills,
All of the nightly creatures,
Sleep and lay still.
And when the sun rises,
Shining so bright.
We will look forward,
To another moonlit night.
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Author:
Poetic_Pixel (
Offline) - Published: November 8th, 2017 15:45
- Comment from author about the poem: I wanted to make a poem about how even though we can have one of the darkest nights. We will have our shining moon to light up our path. Also don't be too harsh on judging my poem this is the first one I made.
- Category: Nature
- Views: 32
Offline)
Comments1
Welcome to MPS, PP! Don't worry, nobody will judge you or your writing. We are here to encourage each other, and, if requested, to give gentle advice. Your rhyming is good, your structure is good. Maybe you could try to find synonyms for the word 'shining' which seems to repeat maybe a little bit too often, unless it was done on purpose. You do have artistic freedom!
Thanks for the advice. I have also noticed I used "shining" just a little too often and I should use more expressive words. I'm still new to the whole poem thing so I won't be the best at it on my very first poem. But I am looking to get better at making poems, and hopefully, make something more along the way.
PP, there are sites on the internet that will help. Type in "synonyms" or "rhyming" and you will find these sites. The synonyms sites will give you many choices of words that mean the same or nearly the same thing as the word you type in. Great help!
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