Adrianna Kjeld

Cold

I can testify that  it is  cold,  by degree,  outside, 
and on the inside its cascading- raining, but not in pride. 

It's not been as chilly as when my now ex was by my side, 
but a sweater can't mask the cold that triggers the twitch inside, or muffle the harshest thoughts to one's self that whispers, " it's not that you don't love him its that maybe he doesn't love you" and that is when the tears depart, because this is after your own harsh insults have  attacked your heart. 

You tell yourself, 
"You're ugly, disgusting, and your skin is ghastly, you're only comparable to a complete catastrophe."

How does he love you with the words that trail from his tongue?
How does he love you with his dancing fingertips and bite you like a plum?
How does he love you on the days that have left you feeling numb?


How does he love you gentle and sweet like you're not a catastrophe? 
How does he treat you like your breath has never smelt like cigarettes and mead?
How does he love you like you've never done drugs?
How does he treat you like you're number one?
How does he love you like his heart is only yours?

These are questions you and I can answer... 
a personal reassurance that your love is NOT a cancer. 




Comments1

  • FredPeyer

    Adrianna, I like your raw, straight forward writing. I wonder though how it can be love if somebody says:
    "You're ugly, disgusting, and your skin is ghastly, you're only comparable to a complete catastrophe."
    to you.Judging from your picture, you look perfectly fine to me!

    • Adrianna Kjeld

      Oh dear, he would never say that to me. I had said it to myself. It is such a hateful thing to say, and I read don't consider myself a pessimist but some days I'm hard on myself.

      PS thank you for the compliment 🙂

      • Adrianna Kjeld

        Oh dear, he would never say that to me. I had said it to myself. It is such a hateful thing to say, and I read don't consider myself a pessimist but some days I'm hard on myself.

        PS thank you for the compliment 🙂

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