It's your birthday
And your back home from school
Just about to open that door to your house
Hoping and knowing that people are there
Just waiting to surprise you
You open that door
Nothing happened
Dad sitting on the couch
Mom in bed
Brother playing video games
At that moment you realized
They forgot
They forgot the most
Important day of your life
And nobody even gave the courage
To remember
At that moment
You walk in the way going to the kitchen
wanting to get that knife and camera
You enter threw the door
"SUPRISE"
Everyone is there
Your wiping tears off your face
And all of a sudden
You realize
Your life matters
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Author:
Poem Goals (
Offline) - Published: December 7th, 2017 16:08
- Comment from author about the poem: Made it for inspiration.
- Category: Unclassified
- Views: 46
- Users favorite of this poem: Alexa Malyn
Offline)
Comments3
This probably doesn't relate to it, but I wrote it because of a text called "Birthday Box"
That's a good poem- some spelling errors- but good.
Can you tell me the errors for the future?
Sure. You need a comma at the end of every line, save for the last. The last you need a period on the last line. The first letter of every line needs to be capitalized.
\"You enter threw the door...\"
\"Threw\" is actually spelled \'Through.\'
\"SUPRISE\' is spelled \"Surprise.\"
That\'s it. Good work!
Thank you! I'll be more cautious in the future for more poems
Your welcome! You have a knack for writing for sure!
Can totally relate to this poem. Oversee some errors but overall, it's good. Keep up the good work.
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