Yikes, I got man boobs!

with noticeable burgeoning bosom in the offing, ahoy

this baby faced blubbery bosom beastie boy

fast becoming a bra man, and might hire himself out

as a male wet nurse for employ

ment, cuz when stark naked on shark tank,

I behold two bopping, brewing, busting

flap jacks in search of a frying pan,

which change in my physiognomy doth annoy

but, suddenly spurring, this ordinarily calm, cool, and collected chap

positing even a more radical income idea

changing ma name to Chester, letting hooters get suckled, though,

methinks they qualify as milk duds

tit two siamese twin guys christened ell and roy

offering accompanied with serving of cookies,

where adipose floppy blimps rank popular as novel cheap toy

where art though washboard stomach,

where brestworks didst sprout as if overnight a markedly increased

from flat “Joe” six pack chest did an about face, with squishy, mushy, and doughy


sprang up without doubt suddenly forcing a sexual identity crisis,

which freaky phenomenon makes me wanna pout

for weird, wicked woebegone affects the psyche of this lviii aged lout

wondering what other transitions, this fellow may indeed be on the look out

feigning to traverse (in me mind) badgering

rugged hormonal secretion terrain akin to a girl scout

on the prowl targeting a peeping tom, whose foolery demands clout,

thus this imposed unfair punishment, as some half assed irreversible decree

maybe hints of other surprises, yet tubby revealed, which haint no fallacy

possibly being brewed up by a brood of bruiting imps of the pervert with glee

some bot sized microscopic anti bosom buddy hood stolen the genetic key

analogous to a pesky malware, virus, trojan horse secrete lee

scheming to transform the sexual identity of me perhaps waking up tomorrow minus

my little peppy penis , and behold a pussy, should such an outcome prevail,

where media papparazzi stake out this freak of nature re:

doubling efforts erecting fortifications in a big old sassy tree,

especially if the press (i.e. particularly meaning Wikileaks)

discovers visa vis ability to experience infinite orgasms

converting sexual predilection into electric utility.