James

You were my first love.

I had never slept in someone's arms until you came along.

I had never been in someone's arms until you came along.

I was 17 when I first woke up on top of your chest.

I wasn't your girlfriend so i tried to get up quickly.

I turned on my side stuck between you and a wall.

You were memorizing as you lay asleep, I watched you sorry I'm a creep.

You then awoke and looked at me, and smiled.

You and your smile.

It makes me fucking melt.

You grabbed my waist and pulled me in closer.

I didn't care while with you.

It took two years til I saw you again.

Dont.

Look.

at.

him.

dont acknowledge hes here.

How could I do that?

you were at my house party.

I was so drunk i thought I smoked cigarettes!

yuck!

you laughed at that, that big kinda gut laugh.

I loved that.

No one spoke, but you.

you said "I know you, and you dont smoke these"

you knew my own morals while everyone else was seconds away from handing me one.

all in all i think drunk me that night just wanted your attention.

I have always had that though.

So at your moms wedding when she mentioned

you were bringing that hoe

It slipped away from me for a second,

all of reality.

because you were mine, but I not yours.

I understand that now you see.

You chose her

and I him,

because the pain I couldn't take alone

because she was in those big ol arms,

the ones I wanted to call home.