Do you know me?

Do you know me?
I don’t think you do,
How can you know me,
When you haven’t seen me blue?
You haven’t seen me crying,
On my knees in sadness
Or when I felt like dying,
When a blade gave me gladness.
You’ve only seen an act,
When I painted on a smile,
Feelings kept intact-
When I wanted to run for miles,
As far away as possible,
With nobody else but me,
To a paradise called heaven,
Where I will finally be free.