Brother

I remember how it feels.
To have your have your joints go numb
Bitter tenderness hits to the bone
Harder than any punch you throw
I hold on sometimes to relive that feeling
Of sharp object piercing my shoulder
And the crying the crying
The screaming, the snarling
Why were we always alone together?
Did no one think to protect me from her?

You blame the stress I blame your mother
Spiteful hatred passed down to another
Hating me for falling in love
But what I remember was year from not above
Deny it all the time but I remember clearly
You don't forget not being loved dearly
So everytime I'm underwater,
swallowing sticky sticky pills or suffocating my lungs
I remember the time you wish I were someone
So everytime I fail to bring him back
I'm a disappointment to you and everyone else

End of summer your post is up and everyone crying for your hard loss
But would you remember me at the beginning?
When flower start blooming and things start improving
Probably not because you wanted him
Favouritism strike where stone is placed clearly
And the hatred, I feel for something never living
Dear brother I'm selfish but still breathing
If I could exchange my life for yours?
Id take it to satisfy that fucking whore

God you're so lucky to be free from her
Your genetics run no further than narcissism and curls
I bet you'd have her eyes aswell
The ones that pierce into your ugly ugly heart
When I cut, I cut all traces of her
In hope DNA could drip drip drip on the floor
But no amount of pills will make me thinner
End up eating take out for dinner

Remember the time I flew down the stairs? Remember the hands that pushed me somewhere
She didn't mean not entirely
Took too far more than likely
And every single time she'd fuck me about
Tell me I'm wrong
She's a victim like me she shouts
But she's never been told she wishes i were dead
And you didn't deserve to die
I did instead

So brother, brother I've taken my leave
She's all yours for the taking to go ahead and keep
I don't want a mother like that
Who ties pretty bows round my broken neck
Now you will see, now you will see
Why I wish I were the dead one
And could not breath