Monika

Dear Dani,


Notice of absence from Monika
I'm not here right now but please come again!

sometimes, i wish you were here with me
so you can tell me how to write this poem
because i am terrible with words
and even worse with feelings.

But i know if you were here,
it would be written the way you like it
because i don't want to be a failure.
i want you to love the way i write about you.

i know it won't work ou,
but i really want it to.
so bad that it kinda hurts you know.
it makes me feel ignored
and i feel stupid because

if i wait, you will be gone
but if i don't, you might 
not want to be near me.

and then there are the secrets
secrets that very few know
and they will turn you away
but they were only stupid mistakes
that i won't make again.

i am just scared to tell you
i am scared to show you the real me.

i am not worth it.
i want to be, but i know i am not
because you don't notice me
because i am invisible
because you don't care about me.
that's what i think.

i am in love with you.
really, i am.
and i am okay with that.

do you accept my confession?
are you okay with that?



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