The gates are locked

If only my skin were as delicate as paper
I'd put my arm through the paper shredder
And if only my bones were as fragile as yours
I'd snap each one, naming ofcourse.

Why was It me little brother?
You were destined, Not me for sure
Mollycoddled with love and need
I was surprise, unwanted, deluded

My time was up sixteen years too late
So I don't understand why I'm not at hells gate
By some God I've survived each obstacle
Dear Lucifer, I'm doing my best father

I don't understand why I haven't been summoned
Each opportunity I've survived unwantingly
What greater force is preventing my extraction?
This prolonged happiness is a little tedious

I was due to take off but my flights been cancelled
Engine sabotaged, lead by my example
No stairway was offered to me
A highway blown up in rubber and ash

Is this my punishment for all I've done?
Each petal i plucked and wing I tore off?
A life long sentence in isolation
For crimes, for crimes that were not intended

The gates are locked, I'm stuck still living
First of a new mistake I'd succumb to.
Each breathe destined to be my last
Became my rebirth