To Ana, my lover.

Waking up to stars on ceilings
Purple bruises on grey skin
Shaky hands and battered feet on
Almonds in zipped up bags tight
How many calories does it take to breathe?
Nails cut down to bone
Measuring happiness by the steps I take
I'm drowning, there's that much water
Eat your salad you fatty
No thank You, I'm not hungry
Desperate fingers clutching each rib
Standing up and the world goes dark
I ate 86, far too much
Green tea is my best friend
How many calories in toothpaste again?
Black nail polish to cover the yellow
My heart burns so heavy
How many calories do you burn in a sneeze?
Thighs as squishy as pillows
I haven't ate for 15 hours
Wrapped my hand round my wrist
No one must see my mistakes
Do I look thinner than yesterday?
I cut myself on collarbones
Can't look at myself it's too painful
No thank you, I already ate
Butterfly pelvis desperately trying to escape
Oxygen tastes like cake
Battered feet on and off the scales
I only lost a stone
I'm still too fat
Back to the start again