Surrender

What does it mean to surrender a thing?
To give it to the highest of kings
Do I hand it over with tight fists and clenched teeth
Or do I simply drop it and skip away mindlessly
Is this something I’m ready to give away?
I have guarded it so closely over the years
Maybe it should just stay
Maybe I should just keep hanging on
I have coped for this long
Able to pretend that I’m doing ok
acting as if it’s already gone
Until it creeps back up and tries to bite me.

So let’s just say I really give this away
How do I know that it won’t come back to haunt me
There I am just moving on peacefully
happy, and smiling
when BAM it hits me
Blind siding me like a punch to the face
It almost seems as if that would be harder to take

Beloved, beloved
I hear you crying
I see your struggle and your fighting
All of these things were never meant to be yours
But Because of sin on the earth there is constant turmoil
See if you give this away you can be free
If it comes back to haunt you you’ll know you never gave it to ME
There will always be circumstances
Day In and day out
Trying to hurt you and blind you
Yet you never reach out
Until it hurts so bad you scream and you shout
And when the load gets so heavy you fear you can’t bear it
You give Me twenty one questions
But When I answer
you don’t want to hear it

You say you have faith and you say you believe
But you question My ability and My willingness to free you
So what shall I say
Shall I tell you the truth

Truly truly I say
That My Holy One has come to you
The Son has shone on your world and lit up the path
And this still has not kept you from looking back

So I will stay here true to My word
I will not waiver or swerve
I will be that I AM
So believe or do not
This is your task
because words are just words until they bear fruit
If it blossoms out rotten
I will know then  that My promises were forgotten.