Seeing Clearly With Broken Glass

What hurts about me never being enough to you is that i was at one point. I used to be more then enough I used to be everything you told me I flipped your world upside down you told me you’d love me forever and always. Forever and always is lies. Me being enough was a lie. Talking about future was a lie. Now I’m left mixed into the dust as just another pebble with no impact in your life. I’m nothing to you and yet I’m still sitting here loving you. I wouldn’t wish this on my worst enemy I would never wish this on you or your new girl, who happens to call me her best friend and she knows I still love you, not even on her. No matter how much this hurts I wouldn’t wish it on anyone I don’t want this pain on anyone. I don’t understand, I don’t even know what I don’t understand. I guess it’s how i can love someone who i opened up to and trusted with my heart just to break it. 

Those poems about hearts being glass and it slipping trough his hands and breaking on the floor are bullshit. You grabbed mine and you held it near and dear to your metal heart and when you looked close there were scratches many of them and you didn’t care you still held my glass heart close. I was enough. But as time went on you forgot about the scratches and you looked back seeing them again and i wasn’t enough. My heart was a hard glass all the way to the core and you had all its love all the way to the core but this wasn’t enough. My heart did not slip through your hands you did not drop it, you took me to the hardest ground and you smashed it. 

I don’t feel guilt anymore for writing how I feel, you know what you did and you know every time you added a scratch to my heart yourself but you left me there still opened up to you picking up the pieces to my heart as i apologize for not being enough. I don’t know how it took me half a year to realize I am enough. I am enough. I am more then enough. I was just too much for you. 

Although all this I still can’t decide if I would go back to you. It should be a hard no I know what the answer is my brain is telling me it but my heart is saying something different.