Metaphorical I Love You

What's a good metaphor for "I'm mad at you because im in love with you"
How about for "When I close my eyes while you kiss me I can see you leaning into kiss her"
What about one for "I think of that happening between you and her and somehow I feel that maybe if I was skinnier that wouldn't have happened"
Like maybe if I was smaller like her, maybe if I didn't talk to you about my problems so often, maybe if I wasn't so broken, maybe of I could smile more, if I didn't cry so often, maybe if it wasn't so exsugesting to be with me...
Whats a good one for that feeling?
How can I make such a broken poem sound good?
Should I even say this? Or am I being annoying again?
What's a good metaphor for "I love you and I've already forgave you but please tell me why it happened so I can stop feeling like this"
What's a good metaphor for "She told me it happened and I can't seem to believe you would do so, but I also cant not believe her story"
What's a good metaphor for "I finally got too hurt to even write about something and I dont know what to do"
How about for "You once told me not to turn and sprint away, and I still won't but God I wanna run until I pass out again"
What's one for "I dont want to get out of bed anymore"
One for "You said not to worry about her"
Whats One for "Do you even love me?"
What's a good metaphor for "I trusted you"
What's a good poem for "I fell in love with you, and I trust you, and I still believe every word you said and want a life with you but why didn't you talk to me and why her and do you love me and I'm so mad at you because I love you"
And how do I write it all down?