Nicholas Udall

Rafe royster doyster

[DRAMATIS PERSONAE.

RAFE ROYSTER DOYSTER 2.s
MATHEW MERYGREEKE.s

GAWYN GOODLUCKE, 2.
TRISTRAM TRUSTY, 2.
DOBINET DOUGHTIE, 2.
TOM TRUEPENIE, 2.
SYM SURESBY, 2.
harpax s 2.


$SCRIVENER.
2 ENSIGNS 2.
DAME CHRISTIAN CUSTANCE,s 2.
MAGE MUMBLE-CRUST, 2e.
TIBET TALK-APACE
ANNOT ALYFACEs
THE SCENE


LONDON.]

[2] 2 Prologue.
What Creature is in health, eythei yong or olde,
But som mirth with modestie wil be glad to use
As we in thys Enterlude shall now unfolde,
Wherin all scuriiitie we utterly refuse,
Avoiding such mirth wherin is abuse:
Knowing nothing more comendable for a mans
recreation
Than Mirth which is used in an honest fashion:


Mirth recreates our spirites and voydeth pensive-
nesse,
Mirth increaseth amitie, not hindring our wealth,
Mirth is to be used both of more and lesse,
Being mixed with vertue in decent comlynesse.
As we trust no good nature can gainsay the same:
Which mirth we intende to use, avoidyng all
blame.

The wyse Poets long time heretofore,
Under merrie Comedies secretes did declare,
Wherein was contained very vertuous lore,
With mysteries and forewamings very rare.

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Suche to write neither 2 nor 2 dyd
spare, s
whiche among the learned at this day beares the
bell. s
These with such other therein dyd excell.

Our Coraedie or Enterlude which we intende to
play
Is named Royster Doyster in deede.
which against the vayne glorious doth invey,
Whose humour the roysting sort continually doth
feede.
Thus by your pacience we intende to proceede
In this our Enterlude by Gods leave and grace,
And here I take my leave for a certaine space.
[2.]


FINIS.



ACTUs I. SCAENA I.

MATHEW MERYGREEKE. 2
[MATHEW MERYGREEKE.] As long lyveth the mery
man (they say) .
As doth the sory man and longer by a day.
Yet the Grassehopper for all his Sommer pipyng,
Sterveth in Winter wyth hungrie gripyng,
Therefore an other sayd sawei doth men advise,
That they be together both mery and wise.
Thys Lesson must 1 practise, or else ere long,
Wyth mee Mathew Merygreeke it will be wrong.
In deede men so call me, for by Him that us
bought,s
What ever chaunce betide, I can take no thought
Yet wisedome woulde that I did my selfe bethinke
Where to be provided this day of meate and
drinke:
For knowes ye, that for all this merie note of
mine,

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He might apposes me now that should aske where
I dine.
My lyving lieth heere and there, of Gods grace,
Sometime wyth this good man, sometyme iu that
place,
Sometime Lewis Loytrer biddeth me come neere,
Somewhyles Wathin Waster maketh us good
cheere,
Sometime Davy Diceplayer when he hath well
cast
Keepeth revell route as long as it will last.
Sometime Tom Titiviles) maketh us a feast,
Sometime with sir Hugh Pye I am a bidden
gueast,
Sometime at Nichol Neverthrives I get a soppe,
Sometime I am feasted with Bryan Blinkinsoppe,
Sometime I hang on Hankyn Hoddydodies sleeve,
But thys day on Rafe Royster Doysters by hys
leeve.
For truely of all men he is my chiefe banker
Both for meate and money,and my chiefe shoot-
anker.s
For, sooth Royster Doyster in that he doth say,
And require what ye will ye shall have no nay.
But now of Royster Doyster somewhat to expresse,
That ye may esteeme him after hys worthinesse,
In these twentie townes and seke them through-
out
Is not the like stocke, whereon to graffes a loute.
All the day long is he facing and crakiugs
Of his great actes in fighting and fraymaking:
But when Royster Doyster is put to his proofe,
To keepe the Queeness peace is moie for his
behoofe.
If any woman smyle or cast on hym an eye,
Up is he to the harde eares in love by and by,s

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And in all the hotte haste must she be hys wife,
Else farewell hys good days, and farewell his life,
Maister rafe Royster Doyster is but dead and gon
Excepte she on hym take some Compassion,
Then chiefe of counsell, must be Mathew Mery-
greeke,
What if I for mariage to suche an one seeke?
Then must I sooth it what ever it is:
For what he sayth or doth cau not be amisse,
Holde up his yea and nay, be his nowne white
sonne,s
Prayse and rouse him well, and ye have his heart
wonne,
For so well liketh he his owne fonde fashionss
That he taketh pride of false commendations.
But such sporte have I with him as I would Rot
leese,s
Though I should be bounde to lyve with bread
and cheese.
For exalt hym, and have hym as ye lustii in
deede:
Yea to hold his finger in a hole for a neede.
I can with a worde make him fayue or loth,
I can with as much make him pleased or wroth,
I can wheu I will make him mery and glad,
I can when me lust make him sory and sad,
I can set him in hope and eke in dispaire,
I can make him speake rough, and make him
speake faire.
But I marvell I see hym not all thys same day,
I wyll seeke him out: But loe, he commeth thys
way,
I have yond espied hym sadly comming,
And in love for twentie pounde, by hys glommyng.

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ACTUS I. SCAENA II.

2 RAFE ROYSTER DOYSTER [2] MATHEW
MERYGREEKE.
RAFE ROYSTER. Come death when thou wilt I am
weary of my life.
MATHEW MERYGREEKE. [2.] I tolde you I, we
should wowe enother wife.
RAFE ROYSTER. Why did God make me suche a
goodly person?
MATHEW MERYGREEKE. [2.] He is in by the
weke,s we shall have sport anon.
RAFE ROYSTER. And where is my trustie friende
Mathew Merygreeke?
MATHEW MERYGREEKE. [2.] I wyll mike as I
sawe him not, he doth me seeke.
RAFE ROYSTER. I have hym espyed me thinketh,
yond is hee,
Hough Mathew Merygreeke my friend, a worde
with thee.
MATHEW MERYGREEKE. [2 ] I wyll not heare him,
but make as I had haste,
Farewell all my good friendes, the tyme away
dothe waste,
And the tide they say, tarieth for no man.
RAFE ROYSTER. Thou must with thy good counsell
helpe me if thou can.
MATHEW MERYGREEKE. God keepe thee worshypfull
Maister Royster Doyster,
And fare well the lustie Maister Royster Doyster.
RAFE ROYSTER. l muste needes speake with thee a
worde or twaine.
MATHEW MERYGREEKE. Within a month or two I will
be here againe,
Negligence in greate affaires ye knowe may marre
all.
RAFE ROYSTER. Attende upon me now, and well re-
wirde thee I shall.

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MATHEW MERYGREEKE. I have take my leave, and the
tide is Well spent.
RAFE ROYSTER. I die except thou helpe, I pray thee
be content
Doe thy parte wel nowe, and aske what thou wilt
For without thy aide my matter is all spilt.
MATHEW MERYGREEKE. Then to serve your turne I
will some paines take,
And let all myne owne affaires alone for your sake.
RAFE ROYSTER. My Whole hope and trust resteth
onely in thee.
MATHEW MERYGREEKE. Then can ye not doe amisse
What ever it bee.
RAFE ROYSTER. Gramercies Merygreeke, most bounde
to thee I am.
MATHEW MERYGREEKE. But up with that heart, and
Speake out like a ramme,
Ye speake like a Capon that had the cough now:
Bee of good cheere anon ye shall doe well ynow.

RAFE ROYSTER. Upon thy Comforte, I will all things
Well handle.
MATHEW MERYGRHEKE. So loe, that is a breast to
blowe out a candle.
But What is this great matter I woulde faine
knowe,
We shall fynde remedie therefore I trowe.
Doe ye lacke money? ye knowe myne olde offers,
Ye have always a key to my purse and coffers.
RAFE ROYSTER. I thanke thee: had ever man suche a
frende?
MATHEW MERYGREEKE. Ye gyve unto me: I must
needes to you lende.
RAFE ROYSTER. Nay I have money plentie all things
to discharge.
MATHEW MERYGREEKE. [2.] That knewe I ryght
Well When I made offer so large.
[RAFE ROYSTER.] But it is no suche matter.s
MATHEW MERYGREEKE. What is it than?
Are ye in daunger of debte to any man?
lf ye be, take no thought nor be not afraide,
Let them hardlys take thought how they shall be
paide.

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RAFE ROYSTER. Tut I owe nought.
MATHEW MERYGREEKE. What then? fear ye imprison-
ment?
RAFE ROYSTER. No.
MATHEW MERYGHEEKE. No I wists ye offende not so,
to be shent.s
But if ye[s] had, the Toures coulde not you so
bolde,
But to breake out at all times ye would be bolde.
What is it? hath any man threataed you to beate?
RAFE ROYSTER. What is he that durst have put me in
that heate?
He that beateth me, by His annes, shall well
fynde,
That I will not be farre from him nor runne be-
hinde.
MATHEW MERYGREEKE. That thing knowe all men
ever since ye overthrewe,
The fellow of the Lion which 2 s1ewe.(s)
But what is it than?
RAFE ROYSTER. Of love I make my mone.
MATHEW MERYGREEKE. Ah this foolishe a(s) love,
wilt neares let us alone?
But bicause ye were refased the last day,
Ye said ye woulde nere more be intangled that
way:.
"I would medle no more, since I fyude all so un-
hinde.,,
RAFE ROYSTER. Yea, but I can Rot so put love out of
my minde.
MATHEW MERYGREEHE. But is your love tell me first
in any wise,
In the way of Mariage, or of Merchandise?
If it may otherwise than lawfull be founde,
Ye get none of my helpe for an hundred pounde.
RAFE ROYSTER. No by my trouth I would have hir to
my Wife.
MATHEW MERYGREEKE. Then are ye a good man, and
God save your life,

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And what or who is she, with whome ye are in
love?
RAFE ROYSTER. A woman whome I knowe not by
What meanes to move.
MATHEW MERYGHEEKE. Who is it?
RAFE ROYSTER. A woman yond.
MATHEW MERYGREEKE. What is hir name?
RAFE ROYSTER. Hir yonder.
MATHEW MERYGHEEKE. Whom? [s]
RAFE ROYSTER. Mistresse ah--
MATHEW MERYGHEEKE. Fy fy for shame!
Love ye, and know not whome? but hir yonde, a
Woman,
We shall then get you a Wyfe, I can not tell whan.
RAFE ROYSTER. The faire Woman, that supped wyth
us yestemyght--
And I hearde hir name twice or thrice, and had it
ryght.
MATHEW MERYGREEHE. Yea, ye may see ye nere take
me to good cheere with you,
If ye had, I coulde have tolde you hir name now.
E ROYSTER. I was to blame in deede, but the
nexte tyme perchaunce:.
And she dwelleth in this house.
MATHEW MERYGREEKE. What Christian tustance?
RAFE ROYSTER. Except I have hir to my Wife, I shall
runne madde.
MATHEW MERYGREEKE. Nay unwise perhaps, but I
warrant you for madde.
RAFE ROYSTER. I am utterly dead unlesse I have my
desire.
MATHEW MERYGREEKE. Where be the bellowes that
blewe this sodeine fire?
RAFE ROYSTER. I heare She is worthe a thousande
pounde and more.
ATHEW MERYGREEKE. Yea, but learne this one les-
son of me afore,
An hundred pounde of Marriage raoney doubt-
lesse,
Is ever thirtie pounde stedyng, or somewhat lesse,
So that hir Thousande pounde yf she be thriftie,
Is muche neere about two hundred and fiftie,
Howebeit wowers and Widowes are never poore.

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RAFE ROYSTER. Is she a Widowe? I love hir better
therefore.
MATHEW MERYGREEKE. But I heare she hath made
promise to another.
RAFE ROYSTER. He shall goe without hir, ands he
were my brother.
MATHEW MERYGREEKE. I have hearde say, I am 1ight
well advised,
That she hath to Gawyn Goodlucke promised.
RAFE ROYSTER. What is that Gawyn Goodlucke?
MATHEW MERYGREEKE. A Merchant man.
RAFE ROYSTER. Shall he speede afore me? nay sir by
sweete Sainct Anne.
Ah sir, Backare quod Mortimer to his sowe,(s)
I wyll have hir myne owne selfe I make God a vow.
For I tell thee, she is worthe a thousande pounde.
MATHEW MERYGREEKE. Yet a fitter wife for your
maship might be founde:.
Suche a goodly man as you, might get one wyth
lande,
Besides poundes of golde a thousande and a thou-
sande,
And a thousande, and a thousande, and a thou-
sande,
And so to the summe of twentie hundred thou-
sande,
Your most goodly personage is worthie of no
lesse.
RAFE ROYSTER. I am sorie God made me so comely
doubtlesse,
For that maketh me eche where so highly fa-
voured,
And all women on me so enamoured.
MATHEW MERYGREEFE. Enamoured quod you? have
ye spied out that?
Ah sir, mary nowe I see vou know what is what.
Enamoured ka?s mary sir say that againe,
But I thought not ye had marked it so plaine.
RAFE ROYSTER. Yes, eche where they gaze all upon
me and stare.

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MATHEW MERYGFEEKE. Yea Malkyn, I warrant you as
muche as they dare.
And ye will not beleve what they say in the
streete,
When your mashyp passeth by all such as I meete,
That sometimes I can scarce finde what aunswere
to make.
Who is this (sayth one) sir 2
Who is this, greate 2[s] of Warwike, sayth an
other?
No (say I) it is the thirtenth 2 brother.
Who is this? noble 2 of 2 sayth the
thirde?
No, but of the same nest (Say I) it is a birde.
Who is this? greate 2 or 2
2
No (say I) but it is a brute of the Alie 1ande.(s)
this? greate 2 or 2
2
No, it is the tenth Worthie, say I to them agayne:.
not if I sayd well.
RAFE ROYSTER. Yes for so I AM.
MATHEW MERYGREEKE. Yea, for there were but nine.
worthies before ye came.
To some others, the thirde 2 I doe you call.(s)
And so as well as I can I aunswere them all.
Sir I pray you, what lorde or great gentleman is
this?
MaisterRafe Royster Doyster dame say I, ywis.
O Lorde (Sayth She than) what a goodiy man it is,
Woulde Christ I had such a husbande as he is.
O Lorde (say some) that the sight of his face we
lacke:
It is inough for you (say I) to see his backe.
His face is for ladies of high and noble parages.s
With whome he hardly scapeth great mariages.
With muche more than this, and much otherwise.
RAFE ROYSTER. I Cans thee thanke that thou canst
Suche answeres devise:
But I perceyve thou doste me throughly knowe.
MATHEW MERYGREEKE. I marke your maners for
myne owne learnyng I trowe,

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But suche is your beautie, and suche are your
actes,
Suche is your personage, and suche are your
factes,s
That all women faire and fowle, more and less,
They[s] eye you, they lubbes you, they talke of,
you doubtlesse,
Your p[l]easant looke maketh them all merie,
Ye passe not by, but they laugh till they & werie,
Yea and money coulde I have the truthe to tell,
Of many, to bryng you that way where they
dwell.
RAFE ROYSTER. Merygreeke for this thy reporting well
of mee:
MATHEW MERYGREEKE. What shoulde I else sir, it is
my duetie pardee:.
RAFE ROYSTER. 1 promise thou shalt not lacke, while
I have a grote.
MATHEW MERYGHEEKE. Faith sir, and I nere had
more nede of a newe cote.
RAFE ROYSTER. Thou shalte have one to morowe, and
galde for to spende.
MATHEW MERYGHEEKE. Then I trust to bring the day
to a good ende.
For as for mine owne parte having money inowe,
I Could lyve onely with the remembrance of you.
But nowe to your Widowe whome you love so
hotte.
RAFE ROYSTER. By Cockes thou sayest truthe, I had
almost forgotte.
MATHEW MERYGHEEKE. What if Christian Custance
will not have you what?
RAFE ROYSTER. Have me? yes I warrant you, never
doubt of that
I knowe she loveth me, but she dare not speake.
MATHEW MERYGKEEKE. In deede meete it were some
body should it breake.s
RAFE ROYSTER. She looked on me twentie tymes yes-
ternight

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And laughed so.
MATHEW MERYGREEKE. That she coulde not sitte
upright.
RAFE ROYSTER. No faith coulde she not.
MATHEW MERYGREEKE. No even such a thing I cast.s
RAFE ROYSTER. But for wowyng thou knowest women
are shamefast.
But and she knewe my minde, I knowe she would
be glad,
And thinke it the best chaunce that ever she had.
MATHEW MERYGREEKE. Too hir then like a man, and
be bolde forth to starte,
Wowers never speede well, that have a false harte.
RAFE ROYSTER. What may I best doe?
MATHEW MERYGREEKE. Sir remaine ye a while
[here].[s]
Ere long one or other of hir house will appere.
Ye knowe my minde.
RAFE ROYSTER. Yea now hardly lette me alone.
MATHEW MERYGREEKE. In the meane time sir, if you
please, I wyll home,
And call your Musitians, for in this your case
It would sette you forth, and all your wowyng
grace,
Ye may not lacke your instrumentes to play and
sing.
RAFE ROYSTER. Thou knowest I can doe that.
MATHEW MERYGREEKE. As well as any thing.
Shall I go call your folkes, that ye may shewe a
cast?s
RAFE ROYSTER. Yea runne I beseeche thee in all pos-
sible haste.
MATHEW MERYGREEKE. I goe. 2.
RAFE ROYSTER. Yea for I love singyng out of measure,
It comforteth my spirites and doth me great
pleasure.
But who commeth forth yond from my swete
hearte Custance?
My matter frameth well, thys is a luckie chaunce.

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ACTUS I. SCAENA III.

2 MAGE MUMBKE-CRUST, 2
2 TIBET TALK-APACE, 2
RAFE ROYSTER 2
MAGE MUMBLE-CRUST. If thys distaffe were spoonne,
Margerie Mumble-crust--
TIBET TALK-AFACE. 2 Where good stale
ale is will drinke no water I tmst.
MAGE MUMBLE-CRUST. Dame Custance hath promised
us good ale and white bread.
TIBET TALK-AFACE. If she kepe not promise, I will
beshrewe hir head:
But it will be starke nyght before I shall have
done.
RAFE ROYSTER. 2 I will stande here a while, and
talke with them anon,
I heare them speake of Custance, which doth my
heart good,
To heare hir name spoken doth even comfort my
blood.
MAGE MUMBLE-CRUST. Sit downe to your worke Tibet
like a good girle.
TIBET TALK-AFACE. Nourse, medle you with your
spyndle and your whirle,
No haste but good, Mage Mumble-crust for whip
and whurre
The olde proverbe doth say, never made good
furre. (s)
MAGE MUMBHE-CRUST. Well, ye wyll sitte downe to
your worke anon, I trust.
TIBET TALK-AFACE. Soft fire maketh sweete malte,
good Mage Mumble-crust.
MAGE MUMBLE-CRUST. And sweete malte maketh joly
good ale for the nones.s
TIBET TALK-APACE. Whiche will slide downe the lane
without any bones. s>2

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Olde browne bread crustes must have much good
mumblyng,
But good ale downe your throte hath good easie
tumbling.
RAFE ROYSTER. 2 The jolyest wench that ere I
hearde, little mouse,--
May I not rejoice that she shall dwell in my
house?
TIBET TALK-APACE. So sirrha, nowe this geare begin-
neth for to frame.
MAGE MUMBLE-CRUST. Thanks to God, though your
work stand stil, your tong is not lame.
TlBET TALK-APACE. And though your teeth be gone,
both so sharpe and so fine
Yet your tongue can renne on patinss as well as
mine.
MAGE MUMBLE-CRUST. Ye were not for nought named
Tyb Talk-apace.
TIBET TALK-APACE. Doth my talke grieve you? Alack,
God save your grace.
MAGE MUMBLE-CRUST. I holdes a grote ye will drinke
anon for this geare.
TIBET TALK-APACE. And I wyll pray you the stripes
for me to beare.
MAGE MUMBLE-CRUST. I holde a penny, ye will drink
without a cup.
TIBET TALK-APACE. Wherein so ere ye drinke, I wote
ye drinke all up.
2 ANNOT ALYFACE, 2
ANNOT ALYFACE. By Cock and well sowed, my good
Tibet Talk-apace.
TlBET TALK-APACE. And een as well knitte my nowne
Annot Alyface.
RAFE ROYSTER. 2 See what a sort she kepeth
that must be my wife!
Shall not I when I have hir, leade a merrie life?
TIBET TALK-APACE. Welcome my good wenche, and
sitte here by me just.
ANNOT ALYFACE. And howe doth our old beldame
here, Mage Mumble-crust?

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TIBET TALK-APACE. Chyde, and finde faultes, and
threaten to oomplaine.
ANNOT ALYFACE. To make us poore girles shent to hir
is small gaine.
MAGE MUMBLE-CRUST. I dyd neyther chyde, nor
complaine, nor threaten.
RAFE ROYSTER. 2 It woulde grieve my heart
to see one of them beaten.
MAGE MUMBLE-CRUST. I dyd nothyng but byd hir
worke and holde hir peace.
TIBET TALK-APACE. So would I, if you coulde your
alattering ceasse:.
But the devill can not make olde trotte holde hir
tong.
ANNOT ALYFACE. Let all these matters passe, and we
three sing a song,
So shall we pleasantly bothe the tyme beguile
now,
And ekes dispatche all our workes ere we can tell
how.
TIBET TALK-APACE. I shrew them that say nay, and
that shall not be I.
MAGE MUMBLE-CRUST. And I am well content.
TIBET TALK-APACE. Sing on then by and by.
RAFE ROYSTER. [2.] And I will not away, but
listen to their Song,
Yet Merygreeke and my folkes tary very long.
TIB, AN, 2 MARGERIE, 2

hipe mery Annot. etc.s
Trilla, Trilla. Trillarie.
Worke Tibet, worke Annot, worke Margerie.
Sewe Tibet knitte Annot spinne Margerie.
Let us see who shall winne the victorie.

TIBET TALK-APACE. This sleve is not willyng to be
sewed I trowe,
A small thing might make me all in the grounde
to throwe.
2

Pipe merrie Annot. etc.
Trilla. Trilla. Trillarie.
What Tibet, what Annot what Margerie.

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Ye sleepe, but we doe not, that shall we trie.
Your fingers be nombde, our worke will not lie.

TIBET TALK-APACE. If ye doe so againe, well I would
advise you nay.
In good sooth one stoppes more, and I make holy
day.s
2

Pipe Mery Annot. etc.
Trilla. Trilla. Trillarie.
Nowe Tibbet, now Annot, nowe Margerie.
Nowe whippets apace for the maystrie,s
But it will not be, our mouth is so drie

TlBET TALK-APACE. Ah, eche finger is a thombe to
day me thinke,
I care not to let all alone, choose it swimme or
sinke.
2

Pipe Mery Annot. etc.
Trilla. Trilla. Trillarie.
When Tibet, when Annot, when Margerie.
I will not, I can not, no more can I.
Then give we all over, and there let it lye.

2
TlBET TALK-APACE. There it lieth, the worste is but a
curried cote!s
Tut I am used therto, I care not a grote.
ANNOT ALYFACE. Have we done singyng since? then
will I in againe,
Here I founde you, and here I leave both twaine.
2
MAGE MUMBLE-CRUST. And I will not be long after:
Tib Talk-apace.
TlBET TALK-APACE. What is the matter?
MAGE MUMBLE-CRUST. Yond stode a man al this space
And hath hearde all that ever we spake togyther.

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TIBET TALK-APACE. Mary the more loute he for his
Comming hither.
And the lesse good he can to listen maidens talke.
I care not and I go byd him hence for to walke:.
It were well done to knowe what he maketh here
away.s
RAFE ROYSTER. [2.] Nowe myght I speake to
them, if I wist what to Say.
MAGE MUMBLE-CRUST. Nay we will go both off, and
see what he is.
RAFE ROYSTER. One that hath hearde all your talke
and singyng ywis.
TIBET TALK-APACE. The more to blame you, a good
thriftie husbandes
Woulde elsewhere have had some better matters
in hande.
RAFE ROYSTER. I dyd it for no hanne, but for good
love I beare,
To your dame mistresse Custance, I did your talke
heare.
And Mistresse nource I will kisse you for ac-
quaintanoe.
MAGE MUMBLE-CRUST. I Come anon sir.
TIBET TALK-APACE. Faith I would our dame Custance
Sawe this geare.
MAGE MUMBLE-CRUST. I must first wipe al cleane,
yea I must.
TIBET TALK-APACE. Ill chieves it dotyng foole, but
it must be cust.s
[RAFE 2 MAGE.]
MAGE MUMBLE-CRUST. God yeldes you sir, chads
not so much ichottes not whan,
Nere since chwas bore chwine,s of such a gay
gentleman.
RAFE ROYSTER. I will kisse you too mayden, for the
good will I beare you.

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TlBET TALK-APACE. No forsoth, by your leave ye shall
not kisse me.
RAFE ROYSTER. Yes be not afearde, 1 doe not dis-
dayne you a whit.
TlBET TALK-AFACE. Why shoulde I feare you? I have
not so little wit,
Ye are but a man I knowe very well.
RAFE ROYSTER. Why then?
TIBET TALK-APACE. Forsooth for I wyll not I use not
to kisse men.
RAFE ROYSTER. I would faine kisse you too maiden,
if I myght.
TlBET TALK-APACE. What shold that neede?
RAFE ROYSTER. But to honor you by this light.
I use to kisse all them that I love, to God I vowe.
TIBET TALK-APACE. Yea sir? I pray you when dyd ye
last kisse your cowe?
RAFE ROYSTER. Ye might be proude to kisse me, if ye
were wise.
TlBET TALK-APACE. What promotion were therin?
RAFE ROYSTER. Nourse is not so nice.s
TlBET TALK-APACE. Well I have not bene taught to
kissing and licking.
RAFE ROYSTER. Yet I thanke you mistresse Nourse, ye
made no sticking.
MAGE MUMBLE-CRUST. I will not sticke for a kosse
with such a man as you.
TIBET TALK-APACE. They that lust: I will againe to
my sewyng now.
[2 ANNOT ALYFACE.]
ANNOT ALYFACE. Tidings hough, tidings, dame Cus-
tance greeteth you well.
RAFE ROYSTER. Whome me?
ANNOT ALYFACE. You sir? no sir? I do no suche tale
tell.
RAFE ROYSTER. But and she knewe me here.
ANNOT ALYFACE. Tibet Talk-apace,
Your mistresse Custance and mine, must speake
with your grace.
TIBET TALK-APACE. With me?
ANNOT ALYFACE. Ye muste come in to hir out of all
doutes.

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TIBET TALK-APACE. And my work not half done? A
mischief on all loutes.
2 ]s
RAFE ROYSTER. Ah good Sweet nourse!
MAGE MUMBLE-CRUST. A good sweete gentleman!
RAFE ROYSTER. What?
MAGE MUMBLE-CRUST. Nay I can not tel sir, but
what thing would you?
RAFE ROYSTER. Howe dothe sweete Custance, my
heart of gold, tell me, how?
MAGE MUMBLE-CRUST. She dothe very well sir, and
commaunde me to you.s
RAFE ROYSTER. To me?
MAGE MUMBLE-CRUST. Yea to you sir.
RAFE ROYSTER. To me? nurse tel me plain
To me?
MAGE MUMBLE-CRUST. Ye.
RAFE ROYSTER. That word maketh me alive again.
MAGE MUMBLE-CRUST. She commaunde me to one
last day who ere it was.
RAFE ROYSTER. That was een to me and none other by
the Masse.
MAGE MUMBLE-CRUST. I can not tell you surely, but
one It was.
RAFE ROYSTER. It was I and none other:
commeth to good passe.
I promise thee nourse I favour hir.
MAGE MUMBLE-CRUST. Een so air.
RAFE ROYSTER. Bid hir sue to me for mariage.
MAGE MUMBLE-CRUST. Een so sir.
RAFE ROYSTER. And surely for thy sake she shall
speede.
MAGE MUMBLE-CRUST. Een so sir.
RAFE ROYSTER. I shall be contented to take hir.
MAGE MUMBLE-CRUST. Een so sir.
RAFE ROYSTER. But at thy request and for thy sake.
MAGE MUMBLE-CRUST. Een so sir.
RAFE ROYSTER. And come hearke in thine eare what
to say.

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MAGE MUMBLE-CRUST. Een so sir.
2
2



ACTUS I. SCAENA III.

2 MATHEW MERYGREEKE, DOBINET
DUGRTIE, 2 RARPAX 2
2 RAFE ROYSTER
[2] MAGE MUMBLE-CRUST
2
MATHEW MERYGREEKE. Come on sirs apace, and
quites your selves like men,
Your pains shal be rewarded.
DOBINET DOUGHTIE. But I wot not when.
MATHEW MERYGREEHE. Do your maister worship as
ye have done in time[i] past.
DOBINET DOUGRTIE. Speake to them: of mine office
he shall have a cast.
MATHEW MERYGHEEKE. 2 looke that thou doe
well too, and thy fellow.
HARPAX. I warrant, if he will myne example folowe.
MATHEW MERYGHEEKE. Curtsie whooresons, doukes
you and crouche at every worde.
DOBINET DOUGHTIE. Yes whether our maister speake
earnest or borde.s
MATHEW MERYGREEKE. For this lieth upons his pre-
ferment in deede.
DOBINET DOUGHTIE. Oft is hee a wower, but never
doth he speede.
MATHEW MERYGHEEHE. But with whome is he nowe
so sadiy roundyng yond?
DOBINET DOUGHTIE. With s>2
fonde.
MATHEW MERYGHEEKE. 2 RAFE.] God be at your
wedding, be ye spedde alredie?

|p
I did not suppose that your love was so greedie,
I perceive nowe ye have chose of devotion,
And joy have ye ladie of your promotion.
RAFE ROYSTER. Tushe foole, thou art deceived, this
is not she.
MATHEW MERYGLEEKE. Well mockes muche of hir,
and keepe hir well I vises ye.
I will take no charge of such a faire piece
keeping.
MAGE MUMBLE-CRUST. What ayleth thys fellowe? he
driveth me to weeping.
MATHEW MERYGREEKE. What weepe on the weddyng
day? be memie woman,
Though I say it ye have chose a good gentleman.
RAFE ROYSTER. Kocks nowness what meanest thou
man? tut a whistle!s
[MATHEW MERYGLEELE.] [s] Ah sir, be good to hir,
she is but a gristle,s
Ah sweete lambe and coney.s
RAFE ROYSTER. Tut thou art deceived.
MATHEW MERYGREEKE. Weepe no more lady, ye shall
be well received.
Up wyth some mery noyse sirs, to bring home the
bride.
RAFE ROYSTER. Gogs armes knave, art thou madde? I
tel thee thou art wide.
MATHEW MERYGHEEKE. Then ye entende by nyght to
have hir home brought?
RAFE ROYSTER. I tel thee no.
MATHEW MERYGREELE. How then?
RAFE ROYSTER. Tis neither ment ne thought.
MATHEW MERYGHEEKE. What shall we then doe with
hir?
RAFE ROYSTER. An foolish harebraine,
This is not she.
MATHEW MERYGHEEKE. No is? why then unsayde
againe.

|p
And what yong girle is this with your mashyp so
bolde?
RAFE ROYSTER. A girle?
MATHEW MERYGREEKE. Yea. I dare say, scarce yet
three score yere old.
RAFE ROYSTER. This same is the faire widowes nourse
of whome ye wotte.
MATHEW MERYGREEKE. Is she but a nourse of a house?
hence home olde trotte,
Hence at once.
RAFE ROYSTER. No, no.
MATHEW MERYGHEEKE. What an please your maship
A nourse talke so homelys with one of your wor-
ship?
RAFE ROYSTER. I will have it so: it is my pleasure
and will.
MATHEW MERYGREEKE. Then I am content. Nourse
come againe, tarry still.
RAFE ROYSTER. What she will helpe forward this my
sute for hir part.
MATHEW MERYGREEKE. Then ist mine owne pygs
nie,s and hlessing on my hart.
RAFE ROYSTER. This is our best friend, man!
MATHEW MERYGREEKE. Then teach hir what to say!
MAGE MUMBLE-CRUST. I am taught alreadie.
MATHEW MERYGREEKE. Then go, make Ro delay.
RAFE ROYSTER. Yet hark one word in thine eare.
[DOBINET 2
2 RAFE.]
MATHEW MERYGREEKE. Back sirs from his taile.
RAFE ROYSTER. Backe vilaynes, will ye be privie of my
counsaile?
MATHEW MERYGREEKE. Backe sirs, so: I told you
afore ye woulde be shent.
RAFE ROYSTER. She shall have the first day a whole
pecke of argent.
MAGE MUMBLE-CRUST. A pecke? 2
2 have ye so much
spare?
RAFE ROYSTER. Yea and a carte lode therto,s or else
were it bare,
Besides other movables, housholde stuffe and
lande.
MAGE MUMBLE-CRUST. Have ye lands too.
RAFE ROYSTER. An hundred marks.
MATHEW MERYGREERE. Yea a thousand.
MAGE MUMBLE-CRUST. And have ye cattell too? and
sheepe tool
RAFE ROYSTER. Yea a fewe.
MATHEW MERYGREEKE. He is ashamed the numbre of
them to shewe.
Een rounde about him, as many thousande sheepe
goes,
As he and thou and I too, have fingers and toes.

MAGE MUMBLE-CRUST. And how many yeares olde
be you?
BAFE ROYSTER. Fortie at lest.
MATREW MERYGREEKE. Yea and thrice fortie to them.
RAFE ROYSTER. Nay now thou dost jest.
I am not so olde, thou misreckonest my yeares.
MATHEW MERYGREERE. I know that: but my minde
was on bullockes and steeres.
MAGE MUMBLE-CRUST. And what shall I shewe hir
your masterships name is?
RAFE ROYSTER. Nay she shall make sute ere she know
that ywis.s
MAGE MUMBLE-CRUST. Yet let me somewhat knowe.
MATHEW MERYGHEEKE. This is hee, understand,
That killed the blewe Spider in Blanchepouder
lande. s
MAGE MUMBLE-CRUST. Yea 2 William! zee law!
dyd he zo? law!
MATHEW MERYGREEKE. Yea and the last Elephant
that ever he sawe,
As the beast passed by, he start out of a buske,s
And een with pure strength of armes pluckt out his
great tuske.
MAGE MUMBLE-CRUST. 2 [ 2
2 what a thing was that!

|p
RAFE ROYSTER. Yea but Merygreeke one thing thou
hast forgot.
MATHEW MERYGREEKE. What?
RAFE ROYSTER. Of thother Elephant.
MATHEW MERYGREEKE. Oh hym that fiedde away.
RAFE ROYSTER. Yea.
MATHEW MERYGREEKE. Yea he knew that his match
was in place that day
Tut, he bet the king of Crickets on Christmasse
day,
That he crept in a hole, and not a worde to say.
MAGE MUMBLE-CRUST. A sores man by zembletee.
MATHEW MERYGHEEKE. Why, he wrongs a club
Once in a fray out of the hande of Belzebub.
RAFE ROYSTER. And how, when, Mumfision?
MATHEW MERYGREEKE. Oh your coustrelyngs
Bore the lanteme a fielde so before the gozelyng
Nay that is to long a matter now to be tolde:
Never aske his name Nurse, I warrant thee, be
bolde,
He conquered in one day from 2 to 2
And woonne Townes, nourse, as fast as thou canst
make Apples.
MAGE MUMBLE-CRUST. O Lorde, my heart quaketh
for feare: he is to sore.
RAFE ROYSTER. Thou makest hir to much afearde,
Meerygreeke no more.
This tale woulde feare my sweete heart Custance
right evill.
MATHEW MERYGREEKE. Nay let hir take him Nurse,
and feare not the devill.
But thus is our song dasht. 2
Sirs ye may home againe.
RAFE ROYSTER. No shall they not. I charge you all
here to remaine:
The villaine slaves! a whole day ere they can be
founde.
MATHEW MERYGREEKE. Couche on your maryboness
whooresons, down to the ground!

|p
[DOBINET 2
Was it meete he should tarie so long in one place
Without harmonie of Musike, or some solace?
Who so hath suche bees as your maister in hys
head,
Had neede to have his spirites with Musike to be
fed.
By your maisterships licence.
2
RAFE ROYSTER. What is that? a moate?
MATHEW MERYGREEKE. No it was a fooles feather
had light on your coate.(s
RAFE ROYSTER. I was nigh no feathers since I came
from my bed.
MATHEW MERYGREEKE. No sir, it was a haire that was
fall from your hed.
RAFE ROYSTER. My men com when it plese them.
MATHEW MERYGREEKE. By your leve.
2
RAFE ROYSTER. What is that?
MATHEW MERYGREEKE. Your gown was foule spotted
with the foot of a gnat.
RAFE ROYSTER. Their maister to offende they are
nothing afearde.
What now?
[MERYGKEEKE 2
RAFE's 2
MATHEW MERYGREEHE. A lousy haire from your mas-
terships beard.
OMNES FAMULI.s s 2 And sir for Nurses
sake pardon this one offence.
We shall not after this shew the like negligence.
RAFE ROYSTER. I pardon you this once, and come
sing nere the wurse.
MATHEW MERYGREEKE. How like you the goodnesse
of tkis gentleman, nurse?
MAGE MUMBLE-CRUST. God save his maistership that
so can his men forgeve,
And I wyll heare them sing ere I go, by his leave.
RAFE ROYSTER. Mary and thou shalt wenche, come we
two will daunce.

|p
MAGE MUMBLE-CRUST. Nay I will by myne owne
selfe foote the song perchaunce.
RAFE ROYSTER. Go to it sirs lustily.
MAGE MUMBLE-CRUST. Pipe up a mery note,
Let me heare it playde, I will foote it for a grote.
2s [MAGE 2
RAFE ROYSTER. 2 Now nurse take
thys same letter here to thy mistresse.
And as my trust is in thee plie my businesse.
MAGE MUMBLE-CRUST. It shal be done!
MATHEW MERYCREEKE. Who made it?
RAFE ROYSTER. I wrote it ech whit.
MATHEW MERYGREERE. Then nedes it no mending.
RAFE ROYSTER. No, no.
MATHEW MERYGRREKE. No I know your wit.
I warrant it wel.
MAGE MUMBLE-CRUST. It shall be delivered.
But if ye speede, shall I be considered?
MATHEW MERYGKEEKE. Whough, dost thou doubt of
that?
MAGE MUMBLE-CRUST. What shal I have?
MATHEW MERYGREEKE. An hundred times more than
thou canst devise to crave.
MAGE MUMBLE-CRUST. Shall I have some newe geare?
for my alde is all spent.
MATHEW MERYGREEKE. The worst hitchen wench
shall goe in ladies rayment.
MAGE MUMBLE-CRUST. Yea?
MATHEW MERYGKEEKE. And the worst drudge in the
house shal go better
Than your mistresse doth now.
MAGE MUMBLE-CRUST. Then I trudge with your letter.
2
RAFE ROYSTER. Now may I repose me: Custance is
mine owne.
Let us sing and play homeward that it may be
knowne.
MATHEW MERYGREEKE. But are you sure, that your
letter is well enough?
RAFE ROYSTER. I wrote it my selfe.
MATHEW MERYGKEEKE. Then sing we to dinner.
2

|p
ACTUS I. SCAENA v.

2 CHRISTIAN CUSTANCE 2 MAGE
MUMBLE-CRUST.
CHRISTIAN CUSTANCE. Who tookes thee thys letter
Margerie Mumble-crust?
MAGE MUMBLE-CRUST. A lustie gay bachelor tooke it
me of trust
And if ye seeke to him he will lowes your doing.
CHRISTIAN CUSTANCE. Yea, but where learned he that
manner of wowing?
MAGE MUMBLE-CRUST. If to sue to hym, you will any
paines take,
He will have you to his wife (he sayth) for my
sake.
CHRISTIAN CUSTANCE. Some wise gentlemen belike. I
am bespoken:
And I thought verily thys had bene some token
From my dere spouses Gawyn Goodlucke, whom
when him please
God luckily sende home to both our heartes ease.
MAGE MUMBLE-CRUST. A joylys man it is I wote well
by report
And would have you to him for marriage resort:
Best open the writing, and see what it doth speake.
CHRISTAN CUSTANCE. At thys time nourse I will nei-
ther reade ne breake.
MAGE MUMBLE-CRUST. He promised to give you a
whole pecke of golde.
CBRISTIAN CUSTANCE. Perchaunce lacke of a pynte
when it shall be all tolde.
MAGE MUMBLE-CRUST. I would take a gay riche hus-
bande, and I were you.
CHRISTIAN CUSTANCE. In good sooth Mage, een so
would I, if I were thou.
But no more of this fond talke now, let us go in,
And see thou no more move me folly to begin.

|p
Nor bring mee no mo letters for no mans pleasure,
But thou know from whom.
MAGE MUMBLE-CRUST. I warrant ye shall be sure.
2



ACTUS II. SCAENA I.

2 DOBINET DOUGHTIE.
DOBINET DOUGHTIE. Where is the house I goe to, be-
fore or behinde?
I know not where nor when nor how I shal it finde.
If I had ten mens bodies and legs and strength,
This trottimg that I have must needes lame me at
length.
And nowe that my maister is new set on wowyng,
I trust there shall none of us finde lacke of doyng:
Two paire of shoes a day will nowe be too litle
To serve me, I must trotte to and fro so mickle.s
Go beare me thys token, carrie me this letter,
Nowe this is the best way, nowe that way is
better.
Up before day sirs, I charge you, an houre or
twaine,
Trudge, do me thys message, and bring worde
quicke againe,
If one misse but a minute, than His armes and
woundes,
I woulde not have slacked for ten thousand
poundes.
Nay see I beseeche you, if my most trustie page,
Goe not nowe aboute to hinder my mariage,
So fervent hotte wowyng, and so farre from
wiving,
I trowe never was any creature livyng,
With every woman is he in some loves pang,
Then up to our lute at midnight, twangledome
twang,
Then twang with our sonets, and twang with our
dumps,s

|p
And heyhough from our heart, as heavie as lead
lumpes:
Then to our recorders with toodleloodle poope
As the howlets out of an yvie bushe should
hoope.s
Anon to our gitteme,s thrumpledum, thrumpledum
thrum,
Thrumpledum, thrumpledum, thrumpledum,
thrumpledum thrum.
Of Songs and Balades also is he a maker,
And that can he as finely doe as jacke Kaker,s
Yea and 2 will he dities compose,
Foolishe 2 nere made the like I suppose,
Yet must we sing them, as good stuffe I undertake,
As for such a pen man is well fittyng to make.
Ah for these long nights, heyhow, when will it be
day?
I feare ere I come she will be wowed away.
Then when aunswere is made that it may not bee,
O death why commest thou not? by and by (sayth
he).
But then, from his heart to put away sorowe,
He is as farre in with some newe love next morowe.
But in the meane season we trudge and we trot,
From dayspring to midnyght I sit not nor rest not.
And now am I sent to dame Christian Custance:
But I feare it will ende with a mocke for pastanee.s
I bring hir a ring, with a token in a cloute,s
And by all gesse, this same is hir house out of
doute.
I knowe it nowe perfect, I am in my right way.
And loe yond the olde nourse that was wyth us last
day.

|p
ACTUS II. SCAENA II.

2 MAGE MUMBLE-CRUST 2
DOBINET DOUGHTIE.
MAGE MUMBLE-CRUST. I was nere so shoke up afore
since I was borne,
That our mistresse coulde not have chid I wold
have sworne:
And I pray God I die if I ment any harme,
But for my life time this shall be to me a Charme.
DOBINET DOUCBTIE. God you save and see nurse, and
howe is it with you?
MAGE MUMBLE-CRUST. Mary a great deale the worse
it is for suche as thou.
DOBINET DOUGHTIE. For me? Why so?
MAGE MUMBLE-CRUST. Why wer not thou one of
them, say,
That song and playde here with the gentleman last
day?-
DOBINET DOUGBTIE. Yes, and he would know if you
have for him spoken.
And prayes you to deliver this ring and token. lo
MAGE MUMBLE-CRUST. Nowe by the token that God
tokened, brother,
I will deliver no token one nor other.
I have once ben so shent for your maisters pleasure,
As I wtll not be agayne for all hys treasure.
DOBINET DOUGBTIE. He will thank you woman.
MAGE MUMBLE-CRUST. I will none of his thanke.
2
DOBINET DOUGBTIE. I weene I am a prophete, this
geare will prove blanke:s
But what shouid I home againe without answere
go?
It were better go to 2 on my head than so.
I will tary here this moneth, but some of the house
Shall take it of me, and then I care not a louse.
But yonder commeth forth a wenche or a ladde,
If he have not one Lumbardes touche, s my
lucke is bad.

|p
ACTUS II. SCAENA III.

2 TRUEPENIE. DOBINET 2
TRUEPENIE. I am cleane lost for lacke of mery com-
panl-e,
We gree not halfe well within, our wenches and I,
They will commaunde like mistresses, they will
forbyd,
If they be not served, Truepenie must be chyd.
Let them be as mery nowe as ye can desire,
With tumyng of a hande, our mirth lieth in the
mire,
I can not skill of such chaungeable mettle,
There is nothing with them but ia docke out
nettle. s
DOBINET DOUGHTIE. Whether is it better that I speake
to him furst
Or he first to me, it is good to cast the wurst.
If I beginne first he will smell all my purpose,
Otherwise I shall not neede any thing to disclose.
TRUEPENIE. What boy have we yonder? I will see
what he is.
DOBINET DOUGHTIE. He commeth to me. It is here-
about ywis.
TRUEPENIE. Wouldest thou ought friende, that thou
lookest so about?
DOBENET DOUGHTIE. Yea, but whether ye can helpe me
or no, I dout.
I seeke to one mistresse Custance house here
dwellyng.
TRUEPENIE. It is my mistresse ye seeke too by your
telling.
DOBINET DOUGHTIE. Is there any of that name heere
but shee?
TRUEPENIE. Not one in all the whole towne that I
knowe pardee.
DOBINET DOUGHTIE. A Widowe she is I trow.
TRUEFENIE. And what and she be?
DOBINET DOUGHTIE. But ensured to an husbande.
TRUEPENIE. Yea, so thinke we.

|p
DOBINET DOUGBTIE. And I dwell with hir husbande
that trusteth to be.
TRUEPENIE.In faith then must thou needes be wel-
come to me,
Let us for acquaintance shake handes togither,
And what ere thou be, heartily welcome hither.
2 TIBET TALK-APAGE 2 ANINOT ALYFACE.]
TIBET TALK-APACE. Well Truepenie never but
flinging.s
ANNOT ALYFACE. And frisking?
TRUEPENIE. Well Tibet and Annot still swingyng and
whiskyng?
TIBET TALK-APACE. But ye roile abroade.s
ANNOT ALYFACE. In the streete evere where.
TRUEPENIE. Where are ye twaine, in chambers when
ye mete me there?s
But come hither fooles, I have one nowe by the
hande,
Servant to hym that must be our mistresse hus-
bande,
Byd him welcome.
ANNOT ALYFACE. To me truly is he welcome.
TIBET TALK-APACE. Forsooth and as I may say,
heartily welcome.
DOBINET DOUGHTIE. I thank you mistresse maides.
ANNOT AEYFACE. I hope we shal better know.
TIBET TALK-APACE. And when wil out new marter
Come?
DOBINET DOUGHTIE. Shortly I trow.
TIBET TALK-APACE. I would it were to morow: for
till he resorte
Our mistresse being a Widow hath small comforte,
And I hearde our nourse speak of an husbande to
day
Ready for our mistresse, a riche man and a gay,
And we shall go in our Frenche hoodes every day,
In our silke cassocks (I warrant you) freshe and
gay
In our tricke ferdegewss and billimentss of golde,

|p
Braves in our sutes of chaunge seven double folde,
Then shall ye see Tibet sirs, treade the mosse so
trimme,
Nay, why sayd I treade? ye shall see hir glide and
swimme,
Not lumperdee clumperdee like our spaniell Rig.
TRUEPENIE. Mary then prickmcdainties come toste
me a fig.
Who shall then know our Tib Talk-apace trow ye?
ANNOT ALYFACE. And why not Annot Aiyface as fyne
as she?
TRUEPENIE. And what had Tom Truepenie, a father
or none?
ANNOT ALYFACE. Then our prety newe come man will
looke to be one.
TRUEPENIE. We foure I trust shall be a joily mery
knot.
Shall we sing a fitte to welcome our friende,
Annot?
ANNOT ALYFACE. Perchaunce he can not sing.
DOBINET DOUGHTIE. I am at all assayes.s
TIBET TALK-APACE. By Cocke and the better wel-
come to us alwayes.
2

A thing very fitte
For them that have witte,
And are felowes knitte
Servants in one house to bee,
Is fast fast for to sitte,
And not oft to flitte,
Nor varie a whitte,
But lovingly to agree.

No man complainyng,
Nor other disdayning
For losse or for gainyng,
But felowes or friends to bee.
No grudge remainyng,
No worke refrainyng,

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Nor helpe restininyng,
But lovingly to agree.

No man for despite,
By worde or by write
His felowe to twite,s
But further in honestie,
No good turnes entwite,s
Nor olde sores recite,
But let all goe quite,
And lovingly to agree.

After drudgerie,
When they be werie,

To laugh and sing they be free
With chip and cherie
Heigh dene derie,
Trill on the berie,s
And lovingly to agree.

2

TIBET TALK-APACE. Wyll you now in with us unto
our mistresse go?
DOBINET DOUGHTIE. I have first for my maister an er-
rand or two.
But I have here from him a token and a ring,
They shall have moste thanke of hir that first doth
it bring.
TIBET TALK-APACE. Mary that will I.
TRUEPENIE. See and Tibet snatch not now.
TIBET TALK-APACE. And why may not I sir, get
thanks as well as you? 2
ANNOT ALYFACE. Yet get ye not all, we will go with
you both.
And have part of your thanks be ye never so loth.
2
DOBINET DOUGBTIE. So my handes are ridde of it: I
care for no more.
I may now retum home: so durst I not afore.
2

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ACTUS I. SCAENA IIII.

2 CHRISTIAN CUSTANCE, TIBET [TALK-
APAGE,] ANNOT ALYFACE, 2 TRUEPENIE.
CHRISTIAN CUSTANCE. Nay come forth all three: and
come hither pretie mayde:.
Will not so many forewarnings make you afrayde?
TIBET TALK-APACE. Yes forsoth.
CHRISTIAN CUSTANCE. But stil be a runner up and
downe,
Still be a bringer of tidings and tokens to towne.
TIBET TALK-APACE. No forsoth mistresse.
CHRISTIAN CUSTANCE. Is all your delite and joy
In whiskyng and rampings abroade like a Tom
boy.
TIBET TALK-APACE. Forsoth these were there too,
Annot and Truepenie.
TRUEPENIE. Yea but ye alone tooke it ye can not
denie.
ANNOT ALYFACE. Yea that ye did.
TIBET TALK-APACE. But if I had not ye twaine would.
CHRlSTIAN CUSTANCE. You great calfe, ye should have
more witte, so ye should:
But why shoulde any of you take such things in
hande?
TIBET TALK-APACE. Because it came from him that
must be your husbande.
CHRISTIAN CUSTANCE. How do ye know that?
TIBET TALK-APACE. Forsoth the boy did say so.
CHRIST1AN CUSTANCE. What was his name?
ANNOT ALYFACE. We asked not.
CHRISTIAN CUSTANCE. No?s
ANNOT ALYFACE. He is not farre gone of likelyhod.
TRUEPENIE. I will see.
CHRISTIAN CUSTANCE. If thou canst finde him in the
streete bring him to me.
TRUEPENIE Yes. 2

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CHRISTIAN CUSTANCE. Well ye naughty girles, if ever I
perceive
That henceforth you do letters or tokens receive,
To bring unto me from any person or place,
Except ye first shewe me the partie face to face,
Eyther thou or thou, full truly abyes thou shalt.
TIBET TALK-APACE. Pardon this, and the next tyme
pouders me in salt.
CHRISTIAN CUSTANCE. I shall make all girles by you
twaine to beware.
TIBET TALK-APACE. If I ever offende againe do not me.
spare.
But if ever I see that false boy any more
By your mistreshyps licence I tell you afore
I will rather have my cote twentie times swinged,
Than on the naughtie wag not to be avenged.
CHRISTIAN CUSTANCE. Good wenches would not so
rampe abrode ydelly,
But keepe within doores, and plie their work
earnestly,
If one would speake with me that is a man likely,
Ye shall have light good thanke to bring me worde
quickly.
But otherwyse with messages to come in post
From henceforth I promise you, shall be to your
cost.
Get you in to your work.
TIBET 2 ANNOT. Yes forsoth.
CHRISTIAN CUSTANCE. Hence both twaine.
And let me see you play me such a part againe.
2 TIBET 2 ANNOT. 2 TRUEPENIE.]
TRUEPENIE. Maistresse, I have runne past the farre
ende of the streete,
Yet can I not yonder craftie boy see nor meete.
CHRISTIAN CUSTANCE. No?
TRUEPENIE. Yet I looked as farre beyonde the people.
As one may see out of the toppe of Paules steeple.
CHRISTIAN CUSTANCE. Hence in at doores, and let me
no more be vext.
TRUEPENIE. Forgeve me this one fault, and lay on
for the next. [2.]

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CHRISTIAN CUSTANCE. Now will I in too for I thinke
so God me mende,
This will prove some foolishe matter in the ende.
2



ACTUS [I]II. SCAENA I.


2 MATHEW MERYGREEKE.
MATHEW MERYGREEKE. Nowe say thys againe: he
hath somewhat to dooing
Which followeth the trace of one that is wowm- g,
Specially that hath no more wit in his hedde,
Than my cousin Royster Doyster withall is ledde.
I am sent in all haste to espie and to marke
How our letters and tokens are likely to warke.
Maister Royster Doyster must have aunswere in
haste
For he loveth not to spende much labour in
waste.
Nowe as for Christian Custance by this light,
Though She had not hir trouth to Gawyn Good-
lucke plight,
Yet rather than with such a loutishe dolte to marie,
I dare say woulde lyve a poore lyfe solitarie,
But fayne woulde I speake with Custance if I wist
how
To laugh at the matter, yond commeth one forth
now.



ACTUS III. SCAENA II.

2 TIBET [TALK-APACE].
MERYGHEEHE 2
TIBET TALK-APACE. An that I might but once in my
life have a sight
Of him that made us all so yll shent by this light
He should never escape if I had him by the eare,
But even from his head, I would it bite or teare.
Yea and if one of them were not inowe,
I would bite them both off, I make God avow.

|p
MATHEW MERYGREEKE. What is he, whome this little
mouse doth so threaten?
TIBET TALK-APACE. I woulde teache him I trow, to
make girles shent or beaten.
MATHEW MERYGREEKE. I wili call kir: Maide, with
whome are ye so hastie?
TIBET TALK-APACE. Not with you sir, but with a little
wag-pastie,s
A deceiver of folkes, by subtill craft and guile.
MATHEW MERYGREEKE. 2 I knowe where she
is:s Dobinet hath wrought some wile.
TIBET TALK-APACE. He brought a ring and token
which he sayd was sent
Frora our dames husbande, but I wot well I was
shent:
For it liked hir as well to tell you no lies,
As water in hir shyppe, or salt cast in hir eies:
And yet whence it came neyther we nor she can
tell.
MATHEW MERYGREEKE. 2 We shall have sport
anone: I like this very well.
And dwell ye here with mistresse Custance faire
maide?
TIBET TALK-APACE. Yea mary doe I sir: what would
ye have sayd?
MATHEW MERYGREEKE. A little message unto hir by
worde of mouth.
TIBET TALK-APACE. No messages by your leave, nor
tokens forsoth.
MATHEW MERYGREEKE. Then help me to speke with
hir.
TIBET TALK-APACE. With a good wil that.
Here she commeth forth. Now speake ye know
best what.
2 CHRISTIAN CUSTANCE.]
CHRISTIAN CUSTANCE. None other life with you maide,
but abrode to skip?
TIBET TALK-APACE. Forsoth here is one would speake
with your mistresship.

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CHRISTIAN CUSTANCE. Ah, have ye ben learning of mo
messages now?
TIBET TALK-APACE. I would not heare his minde, but
bad him shewe it to you.
CHRISTIAN CUSTANCE. In at dores.
TIBET TALK-APACE. I am gon. 2
MATHEW MERYGREEKE. Dame Custance God ye save.
CHRISTIAN CUSTANCE. Welcome friend Merygreeke:
and what thing wold ye have?
MATHEW MERYGKEEKE. I am come to you a little mat-
ter to breake.
CHRISTIAN CUSTANCE. But see it be honest, else bet-
ter not to speake.
MATHEW MERYGREEKE. Howe feele ye your selfe
affected here of late?
CHRISTIAN CUSTANCE. I feele no maner chaunge but
after the olde rate.
But whereby do ye meane?
MATHEW MERYGREEKE. Concernlng mariage.
Doth not love lade you?
CHRISTIAN CUSTANCE. I feale no such cariage.s
MATHEW MERYGREEKE. Doe ye feele no pangues of
dotage? aunswere me right.
CHRISTIAN CUSTANCE. I dote so, that I make but one
sleepe all the night.
But what neede all these wordes?
MATHEW MERYGREEKE. Oh jesus, will ye see
What dissemblyng creatures these same women bel
The gentleman ye wote of, whome ye doe so love,
That ye woulde fayne marrie him, yf ye durst it
move,
Emong other riche widowes, which are of him
glad,
Lest ye for lesing of him perchannce might runne
mad,
Is nowe contented that upon your sute making,
Ye be as one in election of taking.
CHRISTIAN CUSTANCE. What a tale is this? that I wote
of? whome I love?
MATHEW MERYGKEEKE. Yea and he is as loving a
worme againe as a dove.
Een of very pitie he is willyng you to take,

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Bicause ye shall not destroy your selfe for his sake.
CHRISTIAN CUSTANCE. Mary God yelde his mashyp
what ever he be,
It is gentmanly spoken.
MATHEW MERYGREEKE. Is it not trowe ye?
If ye have the grace now to offer your self, ye
speede.
CHRISTIAN CUSTANCE. As muche as though I did, this
time it shall not neede,
But what gentman is it, I pray you tell me plaine,
That woweth so finely?
MATHEW MERYGREEKE. Lo where ye be againe,
As though ye knew him not.
CHRISTIAN CUSTANCE. Tush ye speake in jest.
MATKEW MERYGREEKE. Nay sure, the partie is in good
knackings earnest,
And have you he will (he sayth) and have you he
must.
CHRISTIAN CUSTANCE. I am promised duryng my life,
that is just.
MATHEW MERYGREEKE. Mary so thinketh he, unto bira
alone.
CHRISTIAN CUSTANCE. No creature hath my faith and
trouth but one,
That is Gawyn Goodlucke: and if it be not hee,
He hath no title this way what ever he be,
Nor I know none to whome I have such worde
spoken.
MATHEW MERYGREEKE. Ye knowe him not you, by
his letter and token!
CHRISTIAN CUSTANCE. In dede true it is, that a let-
ter I have,
But I never reade it yet as God me save.
MATHEW MERYGREEKE. Ye a woman? and your letter
so long unredde.
CHRISTIAN CUSTANCE. Ye may therby know what hast
I have to wedde.
But now who it is, for my hande I knowe by gesse.
MATHEW MERYGKEEKE. Ah well I say.
CHRISTIAN CUSTANCE. It is Royster Doyster doubtlesse.

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MATHEW MERYGKEEKE. Will ye never leave this dis-
Simulation?
Ye know hym not.
CHRISTIAN CUSTANCE. But by imagination,
For no man there is but a very doft and loute
That to wowe a Widowe woulde so go about.
He Shall never have me hys wife while he doe live.
MATHEW MERYGREEKE. Then will he have you if he
may, so mote I thrive,
And he biddeth you sende him worde by me,
That ye humbly beseech him, ye may his wife be,
And that there shall be no lets>2 in you nor mis-
trust,
But to be wedded on Sunday next if he lust
And biddeth you to looke for hirn.
CHRISTIAN CUSTANCE. Doth he byd so?
MATHEW MERYGKEEKE. When he commeth, aske hym
whether he did or no?
CHRISTIAN CUSTANCE. Goe say, that I bid him keepe
him warme at home
For if he come abroade, he shall cough me a
mome.s
My mynde was vexed, I shrew his head, sottish
dolt.
MATHEW MERYGREEKE. He hath in his head
CHRISTIAN CUSTANGE. As much braine as a burbolt.s
MATHEW MERYGREEKE. Well dame Custance, if he
heare you thus play choploge.s
CHRISTIAN CUSTANCE. What will he?
MATHEW MERYGREEKE. Play the devill in the horc-
loge.s
CHRISTIAN CUSTANCE. I defye him loute.
MATHEW MERYGREEKE. Shall I tell hym what ye say?
CHRISTIAN CUSTANCE. Yea and adde what so ever thou
canst, I thee pray,
Ahd I will avouche it what so ever it bee.
MATHEW MERYGREEKE. Then let me alone, we will
laugh well ye shall see,

|p
It will not be long ere he will hither resorte.
CHRISTIAN CUSTANCE. Let hym Come when hym lust,
I wishe no better sport.

Fare ye well, I wili in, and read my great letter.
I shall to my wower make answere the better.
2



ACTUS III. SCAENA III.

MATHEW MERYGKEEKE 2
ROYSTER DOYSTER.
MATREW MERYGREERE. Nowe that the whole an-
Swere in my devise doth rest,
I shall paint out our wower in colours of the best.
And all that I say shall be on Custances mouth,
She is author of all that I shall speake forsoth.
But yond commeth Royster Doyster nowe in a
traunce.
RAFE ROYSTER. 2 sende me this day good lucke
and good chaunce.
I can not but come See how Merygreeke doth
speede.
MATHEW MERYGREEKE. 2 I will not See him,
but give him a juttes in deede.
I crie your mastershyp mercie!
2
RAFE ROYSTER. And whither now?
MATHEW MERYGREEKE. As fast as I could runne sir
in poste against you.
But why speake ye so faintly, or why are ye so sad?
RAFE ROYSTER. Thou knowest the proverbe, bycause
I can not be had.s
Hast thou spoken with this woman?
MATHEW MERYGREEKE. Yea that I have.
RAFE ROYSTER. And what will this geare be?
MATHEW MERYGREEKE. No so God me save.
RAFE ROYSTER. Hast thou a flat answer?
MATHEW MERYGREEKE. Nay a sharp answer.
RAFE ROYSTER. What?

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MATHEW MERYGREEKE. Ye shall not (she sayth) by
hir will marry hir cat.
Ye are such a calfe, such an asse, such a blocke,
Such a klbume,s such a hoball,s such a lobcocke,s
And bicause ye shoulde come to hir at no season,
She despised your maship out of all reason.
Bawawes what ye say (ko I)s of such a jentman,
Nay I feare him not (ko she) doe the best he can.
He vauateth him selfe for a m



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