The Retired Bloke

At the next left...


She’s there with me

Every step of the way

No guarantee

To get me there some day

She monitors my progress

She’s more than a women

A favourite song by Tavares

Blurting out from my radio that’s a given. 

When all of a sudden

Without any notice

With touching no button

She aims to provoke us

By telling us our progress

That roadworks will delay us

She gives us an alternative

Which quite frankly

Is sometimes quite punitive

To try to get around the problem

It’s not that I don’t trust her

But that is the problem 

It’s the blind faith that I follow her

Down farmyard tracks 

And through fields

Where doing a u turns simply leads

To further frustration

No option for a conversation

To work out the best solution

She obsessively commands

Direction after direction

Never flustered always the same tone

Droning and moaning to take the next left

When I am bereft

Of any knowledge of where we are

Witlessly driving in my car

Into the unknown

No signal on the phone

No others around to guide

And support me

Just her, my constant irritant

Who seems to be indifferent 

To my feelings my angst

Of being ensconced

In my car with this woman

Help me escape from this trap

Surely someone, anyone

Can lend me a map!



  • Goldfinch60

    I feel so powerful when the sat nav says go left and I go right.

  • Claudelle DeLuna

    Super Cool!
    I thought it was just me not getting along with another woman..😉
    We have a love/ hate relationship!!!

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