I Lay Awake at Night

I lay awake at night

for something to change

then thoughts of my past

make me feel deranged

How could this happen

what did i do

to loose whats precious

not just one but two

i said I would love them

at give them my all

then lost my way

and let them fall

the deserve better

they were all i had

and now theyll be raised

by another dad

I know they love me

but they dont know

I looked like a hero

but it was all a show

I have a love

that keeps me alive

but for how long

till the darkness arives

I never belonged

im just a mistake

I tried to correct it

but it was to late

How can I save them

when I'm a curse

every time I try

I make it worse

I have been blessed

beyond compare

but now its all gone

a pain hard to bare

all I see

is a losing fight

so I hide my tear

And lay awake at night