My devil

Water peaked into the rim of my nostrils

With every thought of the moment my life partner, came face to face with my devil

The water grew taller and felt thicker

At my fingertips, my heart pounded

A lump in my throat, I carried for years

This time, it shifted and sat on top of my lung

My breathe was harder to catch than sanity

When can I stop worrying?

In the blink of an eye, time froze

My breathe slowly got tired so I grasped it firmly

For once, I felt, safe

A blanket of security suddenly covered my reality of nightmares

Reassuring me of my presence

Believed in every worth doubted,

despite that victim label being sown into my entire demeanor

Flashbacks creeping in, I'd dream of the day someone would see me,

robust, 

in spite of stepping into my devils habitat

Thoughts alone fetched the hollow 10 year old girl - frozen with anxiety

In the past, days leading up to agony, food just couldn't stay down, if ever even appealing

After a fair warning of the emotions bound to surface,

my non-fictional Knight in Shining Armour reminded me of stability,

My now

He saw my instinctive tough skin, ready for battle disregarding the war I once faced

Swiftly, my shoulders straightened

My head didn't feel like a ton in that moment

And that breathtaking lump, went down like a room-temperature shot of Hennessy

Sharp as all hell but soothing

Seconding guessing became my second nature

But, no questions raised, concerns didn't invade my thoughts

Although I was out of my element, relief felt sensational

Undoubtedly, worries for safety were still present

Not mine for once on this occasion, 

For my devils