"Spilling Thoughts" Free-Verse Poem

I miss my creativity

Scared of rejection

I’m not that strong

To deal with persecution

 

I know everyone feels the same

Only some don’t hold back

Guess I’m not one

I just give up

 

I’m being stubborn

I’m being stupid

That’s my downfall

Stuck in the middle

 

I’m safe right here

Why risk falling

Because I could win?

Not likely

 

Nothing is real

All is just chance

Tired of standing still

But afraid to move on

 

They say just push through

Sounds easy enough

Can’t get the courage

Something holds me back

 

I know I’m good at what I do

But there’s more to talent

People don’t have to be great

To win the spotlight

 

They just need courage

And people by their side

I’m a nobody

Who really doesn’t try

 

Everything I’ve done

Was because of someone else

They forced me to see

That I can do more

 

The things I love most

Include writing and acting

Neither I strive for

They’re not dependable

 

Acting is worse

You need connections

I was in drama

Didn’t like the teacher

 

She made me feel like shit

I cried a lot that year

I never fit in

Partly my fault

 

I shouldn’t have left

But I couldn’t keep going

So I just gave in

To the fear that I held

 

Was tired of trying

Being ok with nothing

I wanted to scream

Pay attention to me

 

I know that is selfish

It’s not what it seems

I didn’t care for the spotlight

Just wanted to matter

 

I felt like what I did

Didn’t make a difference

I could easily be replaced

My presence meant nothing

 

I was treated like a nobody

Guess that’s what I was

People ignored me

No one wanted to help

 

I was the last

They put me aside

Didn’t consider my feelings

Got tired of trying

 

I don’t know what I’m saying

Just that I’m scared

I don’t want to be stuck

Blending with the rest

 

At the same time though

I’m not like the rest

If you think about it

I’m actually behind

 

People moving on

I’m left right here

Too many reasons

That push me down

 

My mother is scared

She’s lost enough

I can’t even drive

It would be dangerous

 

How am I to grow up

If I’m not shown how

They don’t let me experience

The things I’m supposed to

 

I’m constantly frustrated

I pretend it’s not there

Nothing I can do

Just hope that it changes

 

Too much to say

Doesn’t make a difference

You’ve heard it before

What’s the point

 

There is no ending

Going in circles

What will happen

Just have to find out