Side Effects Of Peace

lonelyraccoon

Who knew that when I found peace

That it came with side effects

There were no warnings

It didn’t take long to identify them

I’m confused by the peace

I’m sad because I’m not appreciating it

I’m scared that it won’t last

I’m mad at myself because I’m wasting it

The days I wake up surrounded in peace

I just find myself crying while I smile

From an unstable past

To now

It doesn’t feel right

I wished for some stability and peace

But it wasn’t what I really wanted

I’ve learned a lot

Now that I’m not climbing the fence

I’m looking through it, wondering

Did I really want to leave

If I miss my breakdowns

It was the life I had

The life I understood

That I lost

I have to understand my present

No one has the answers

So I sit in a daze

Hoping to see the day where life makes sense

 

-.t.b.

 

  • Author: tb (Pseudonym) (Offline Offline)
  • Published: March 14th, 2019 08:58
  • Comment from author about the poem: I am a fan of this poem because it puts my feelings into words, expresses my true feelings and when I'll read this to my therapist I won't be worried about saying the wrong words and getting an unexpected reaction. I've become more aware of my gratitude for poetry for that reason and after a few days on here it's been great to be able to share how I see and feel things.
  • Category: Unclassified
  • Views: 15
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Comments2

  • Nicholas Browning

    I've said it before and I'll say it again! There is only meaning in life if you give it meaning. What life means to you is unique, and it's what you do with that knowledge that defines everything else, I think. I enjoyed the read. I've been in similar situations before, and you're absolutely right. No one has the answers you seek except for you. I noticed that you are new here, so let me extend a friendly welcome to the site! We hope to see you around some more. Best regards.

  • Jo March

    It's a wonderful poem. I really enjoyed it. I think that it's sort of natural for us to be confused by peace. We are used to worrying about events in our lives. We are used to trying to control every aspect of our reality. Peace doesn't seem natural to us. We are used to our busy lives with all the anxiety that accompanies them. At the same time, we long for peace. The irony seems to be that when we finally get the peace, we realize that perhaps that's not we want after all. We want the chaos at the same time... Oh the irony of life! Thank you so much for the poem.



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