baddaytobealive

Silhouette

Shhhh

 

Listen

Do you hear that?

Do you hear the silence?

Good

This is my chance

For a moment of painful bliss

I call it “painful” and “bliss”

For the same reason:

It’s a lie

I finally shut the lids

That weigh down on my tired eyes

In that same second

A silhouette appears in my vision

It’s breathtaking

It’s magical

It’s glowing

It’s kind

It’s you

God, it’s you

Look at you

Damn it!

 

Shhhh

 

My mind splits in two

It’s not real

One half says

Don’t fall for it

And my eyelids wrinkle

As I try to shut them harder

But look

The other tries

Look how beautiful

And peaceful

Look how happy you could be

 

Shhhh

 

It hurts

Stop

Please

I’m begging you

 

Shhhh

 

Shhhh...

 

It’s okay baby

Your silhouette says

As it rocks my body

Back and forth

You’re okay

And it still hurts

But this time

I can shut that one half out

Of my restless mind

 

Shhhh

Hmmm

Hey there

Hi

I’ve missed you

You press kisses

To my temple and shoulder

Me more

You don’t visit me like you used to

I’m sorry

I try

I really do

But it hurts so much

I cry

As you hold me

You wipe a tear off my cheek

And kiss it

It’s okay

I’m right here now

I’m not leaving okay?

I promise

 

Stop!

It’s a lie, you idiot!

 

My eyes fly open

And just like that

You’re gone

I find myself

Still rocking

Back and forth

Only this time

It’s not your silhouette that rocks me

It’s the force of my tears

Comments5

  • ANGELA & BRIAN

    Hi FRIEND ~ welcome to MPS ~ it is an empathetic site and we can share your pain with you ! Poetry is very very cathartic. Despite the angst we both loved the elegance and heart in your Poem ! We are 31 (Angela) and 35 (Brian) engaged and we share this site ! Since we were teenagers we have experienced the agony & ecstasy of *Being in & out Love* its easier for MEN to say *Better to have loved & lost ~ than never to have loved at all* but much harder for Ladies ~ so we do understand. We are thinking of YOU and praying for you at this sad time ! I (BRIAN) am in the UK and ANGELA is on a Work Exchange in New Zealand so we are 11,500 miles apart til OCTOBER ! Our True Love makes the separation a bit easier. Please check our SITE ~ OK

    Blessings & Peace
    Yours ANGELA & BRIAN 🧡💙🧡💙

    • baddaytobealive

      Thank you so so much for your kind words. I actually also kind of had a long distance thing with the person my poem is about and I understand how hard it can get. Thank you for allowing me to share my pain and for receiving it with kindness. I hope to find a strong, true love like yours someday.

    • dusk arising

      Harsh words at a time when they will do you good.... find something else to write about because 1) you write well 2) a more rewarding loves/loves are around the corner for you.

      • baddaytobealive

        Thank you for saying that I write well. I truly appreciate your words. It's really difficult to write about something else because I am entirely consumed by this pain right now. Hopefully I'll start healing soon, but till then, I can't guarantee that my subject matter will change...

        • dusk arising

          OK, so tell us about where you would be in 5 years time if this 'ideal' man had turned out differently.... tell u why i suggest this.... i think that pretty soon it will begin to show you the areas where he wasn't quite ideal at all..... but it has to come from within you.
          I write this hoping you receive it in the positive spirit i send it.

        • 3 more comments

        • Neville

          Much liked by me... and welcome to my poetic side...

          Neville

          • baddaytobealive

            Thank you so much. That means a lot.

            • Neville

              you are much more than welcome my friend...

            • Silkseduction

              Wow- this is an excellent first entry. Please keep sharing your talents!

              • baddaytobealive

                That’s so sweet of you :( thank you! I don’t intend on stopping soon 💕

              • Christina8

                You did very well! Excellent first submission. I hope you keep writing! And welcome to MPS!!--Christina

                • baddaytobealive

                  Thank you so much, really 💖 if there’s one thing I’ll always do, it’s write 😊



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