and barefoot stroll
upon midnight past
where cast of moon
haunts broken glass
over ragged weave
to bare-board low
treads the path
of one more sorrow
-
Author:
dusk arising (
Offline) - Published: August 6th, 2019 00:02
- Category: Unclassified
- Views: 23
- Users favorite of this poem: Fay Slimm.
Offline)
Comments5
May that sorrow soon be lost and the path before you becomes smooth.
Oh no no no my friend.... no such haunting sorrow in my life... this was conjoured up to create the mood only. Creative writing.
Glad to hear that d a.
Have you picked up your saxophone yet. I have done a bit of cat scaring on the clarinet - it may even be music one day
Yes i have actually..... i'm too rusty and have to time things for when the neighbors are out... i shall persevere as you must too.
this is certainly one of your strong points... note.. I said one.....
they dont get much better..... Neville
Yeah, spooky that's me lol. That last line, should it be tread or treads do you think? I still cannot make up my mind which is right. I'd appreciate your opinion.
I prefer treads.. but there aint much in it... it is damned good either way.... N
Thank you, tis edited, i prefer this now.
you are most welcome ..
I like the idea of opening verse with a continued title - - as in "and" - it flows so well into the poetic remainder and as for the the last two lines I have to agree with Neville that the the word "treads" seems to fit better - - and see you have decided it does too......... the metaphors you use in this are to sigh for my friend - first class write and save to my favourites.
Again my inspiration came from trying to picture the mindset of a poet on mps. So rewarding to read others works.
I\'m honoured and so pleased (dancing a small jig) you\'ve appreciated this and placed among your fav\'s.
Re: tread/treads. Sometimes i get so close i can no longer see.... It pleases me to be able to ask an opinion of another.
Those, that trouble follows,
Lost in thought..
Excellently prosed
I felt another visit here was well worth it DA ...
seriously beautiful words and laid upon the page perfectly ....
To be able to comment and rate this poem, you must be registered. Register here or if you are already registered, login here.