sarahlynne

Abandoned

 

At the edge of the village line she stood

An abandoned house dressed in tattered wood

The gabled porch, fringed in oak carved lace

A time worn bonnet slung low across her face

Her windows, moody eyes webbed in grey

Unnerved me as they seemed to trace my way

A weather worn swing clung to one chain

Beside it a three pronged walking cane

Perhaps left there by chance one day

Or had its owner quietly slipped away

Do creaky floors speak sotto voce of treasured lore

Did a happy family once live behind her door

I stood just outside the rusty iron gate

wondering how she had come to this dismal state

How I wish she could speak of days gone by

But sunlight faded, slipping low in the sky

I had to move on; turning to say my goodbyes

I'm sure there was a tear in her sad grey eyes

 

Comments6

  • ron parrish aka wordman

    i have came upon old abandoned houses and wondered who lived there before,you painted a lovely image

    • sarahlynne

      Well this old house was special....i used to live in it...it has since been demolished in lieu of condominiums


      Thank you for readin

      • ron parrish aka wordman

        you`re welcome welcome to mps

      • ANGELA & BRIAN

        Thanks for sharing SARAHLYNNE - Welcome to MPS. Thanks for sharing your first Poem ! It is very elegantly written and very readable and recitable - hallmarks of a GOOD POEM ! Nine perfectly rhyming couplets - our favourite !There is good rhythm throughout. The Subject is as important as the Structure - ABANDONED HOUSES ! I have seen some in New Jersey and they all looked very SAD - so I know what you mean. You have described the sad state of the House perfectly and also your own feelings ! It made the POEM all the more poignant when you revealed it was YOUR OLD HOUSE - WOOOOOOOOW ! I (Brian) have visited several of My Parents (who are still alive) former Homes but they were all well preserved and occupied ! Real Estate in the UK is much more expensive than in the USA and we have EIGHT TIMES less space per person than in the USA - OK. I share this site with Angela my Fiancee and we are buying our FIRST HOUSE next YEAR ! Thanks for sharing - MORE PLEASE !

        Blessings & Peace & Joy
        Yours ANGELA & BRIAN
        🧡💙🧡

        • sarahlynne

          Thanks so much. I appreciate the kind words. I write not so much for form, but the love of expression...(sometimes I strike a good rhythm)

        • Goldfinch60

          This is a wonderful write, I was standing at the gate with you.
          Welcome to MPS.

        • Poetic Dan

          Wow.. Brilliant flow right to the end, like unique year drop. Thank you for your pen, have a wonderful day

          • sarahlynne

            Thank you for reading and I appreciate your thoughtful comment.

            • Poetic Dan

              Tear* that should of been.

            • Olivia

              Really enjoyed this, you can see the time you have put into each line. Very emotional and well written, it’s thoughtful but not too confusing so it really hits. Read it 3 times over.
              If you’d like to checkout my 2 I’d really appreciate some feedback :) -Liv xo

              • sarahlynne

                Thank you. I will look up your poems.

              • FredPeyer

                So well written! Not only could I see that house, I felt it.

                • sarahlynne

                  Thank you so much ...that’s a wonder feeling when someone feels your writing...I am humbled.



                To be able to comment and rate this poem, you must be registered. Register here or if you are already registered, login here.