It's not easy being a bear.
You get given such a bad name.
I mean, everyone's terrified of me
and I haven't done anything.
Sometimes i think i ought to
live up to my bad name and
eat a little girl or something.
Cos that's what you worry about.
I know it's true because
I've read all the posters.
Yes I can read. I've been
reading for about six years now.
Peeping thru the school window
from the woods I learned.
Mrs Lozenski taught me
and I can lip read too.
It's not at all fair you know,
I don't even know what
little girls taste like.
I rekkon those campers
can't read you know
cos they never hide their food
like the posters tell them.
Easy pickings they are.
Oh heck, there's one now
a little girlie thing screaming
and pointing at me.
Well, in for a penny,
in for a pound as they say
if I'm going to eat little girls
then I might as well
start swith her. But...
dammit I've eaten already,
though she's not very big.
I suppose i could squeeze her in
if I skip supper tonite.
Oh look at her, she's far too cute.
I couldn't eat her at all.
I wonder if she brought a dog?
A 'fur snack' I call them.
They usually come right up
to me, yapping, asking for it.
One swipe of the claws and
they start that high pitched
singing thing that they do.
Oh go away little girl
you don't belong here - pest!
Besides it's yummy season
when we all go salmon paddling.
I love a good bloating
of fresh salmon.... much
nicer than that tinned stuff
Right i'm off for a snuffle
and see if i can't find some
campers food along the way.
Gosh i hate little girl screams.
I wonder if she'll go away
if i bang two stones together?
-
Author:
dusk arising (
Offline) - Published: June 7th, 2020 03:48
- Comment from author about the poem: The world could do with some light hearted stuff at the moment.
- Category: Unclassified
- Views: 26
Offline)
Comments3
Ha... very good.. and yes.. we could all do with a little light hearted relief methinks.... ….
and why the long pause, you may ask...…..
Coz I'm a grizzly came the reply...
Neville 🙂
thanks Neville, just a bit of fun
You bring that critta alive with your banter of lighthearted facts and how campers in places where bears live are asking for food to be eaten - -minds so intelligent as those of bears are now working out worldwide how to live nearer communities so they can eat leftovers from bins - -- how clever is that !
TELL 'EM ABOUT THE HONEY MUMMIE.... the honey monster from the 70's..... yes bears aren't so daft
Wonderful fun write d a. Bears are such wonderful creatures as are all except some homo sapiens.
Andy
An old uncle of mine hated bears after meeting one.... his name was Claude.
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