Monsters

We live our lives struggling with monsters in our head,
And one night we encounter a monster sitting with us in our bed.

Afterwards we feel broken, afraid, disgusting, shame, destroyed,
We suffer in silence, suppress emotion, escape discussion and avoid .

Sometimes we try distracting the memory by never wanting to be alone.
Or harm ourselves, abuse ourselves, starve our bodies to the bone.

Recently I've thought long and hard,
Why should that monster win and never pay?
After ruining so much of our life, in every single way.

I know its hard , SO painfully hard.
The first step will most certainly always be.
But if we stand up to the fear inside,
In time we may set that hell in our minds free.

I'm writing this as I wipe a tear, as this is not at all easy.
But I have found the courage to finally admit a monster damaged me.

' Fool me once shame of you, fool me twice shame on me '. This quote - i DON'T agree,
It was NEVER my fault , I'm not to blame and now I FINALLY see. 

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Ps I'm so sorry i've been absent lovelies. I've had some horrible hospital admissions and severe health problems consume me.