dusk arising

the downstream tide


.          running through midnite
.          and the shapes...
.                  there was the estuary
.                  a salvation
.                  for desperation
.                  an escape but
.          would he swim
.          after her...
.                    only one way to find out
 

.                            dark hulks departed
.                            upon the downstream tide
.                            of dancing moonlit waves
.                            thundering their diesel progress
.                            above greaser's music blasting
.                            to thwart a plea
.                            for silence
.                            as sleep found her bones            


.         morning came wet ...cold
.         and the river stank
.                   all over her but
.                   all around
.                   wildfowl cried at life
.                   whilst death stalked
.         in the unknown
.         but where...
.                    was that unknown now

  

Comments6

  • Goldfinch60

    Death stalks us all the time but we have both avoided it in our time so we are still here living a second life which has no boundaries.

    Andy

    • Goldfinch60

      There is a poem there - I'll write it and put it up today d a.

      Andy

      • dusk arising

        I guess thats true. This piece was written after seeing a TV scene which gave me the first two lines, the rest just fell off my fingers.

      • L. B. Mek

        I admire the poetic ambition in your write, so free and defiant

        • dusk arising

          Just an attempt to create a picture and atmosphere. Thank you for looking in and commenting.

        • Lorna

          Get that murky dirty brown water out of my mouth! She didn't like being drowned..........

          • dusk arising

            She's a survivor, a fighter. She does things her way because its her only way. And she succeeds.

          • Fay Slimm.

            Love the freestyle you chose for this haunt of a read D.A. - - your pen captures the desperation perfectly.

            • dusk arising

              A scene in a TV movie gave me the first two lines and i tried to create an atmospheric story picture to take those lines further. Thank you for your reassuring words which reduce my uncertainty to post or not to post.

            • The Uneducated O.A.P

              Another great read from a well educated hand, well, ya know what I mean.

              • dusk arising

                Well educated to the level of failed eleven plus and no CSE or GCE on leaving school at 15. Pops must have thought it didn't matter much when i was made to goto a different school every 15 months or so when he moved me and 3 siblings and mum of course around the country so much.

                But being a good listener can be a good education.

                • The Uneducated O.A.P

                  I only have 3 certificates, driving passed because the examiner was too frightened to get back in the car again, City and Guilds motor mechanic, (good with hands)
                  and wedding certificate that I didn\'t read the small print of, so still trying to pass that one. Lol. As to being a good listener, no good at that because of years of useless teachers and doctors etc not noticing I was deaf.rant over, sorry.
                  Wife knows all about different school too, her father constantly changing his job.
                  He was a medic on the D Day landings so god knows what horrors he saw. Like a lot of our brave service people those that made it home were never the same as when they left our shores. Carrying their physical and mental injuries for the rest of their lives. It\'s no wonder some could never settle into a normal routine.
                  Sorry, again, we seem to have left your poem behind.

                • 2 more comments

                • blue orchid

                  very descriptive,good one



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