There’s an addict inside of me and she wants to come out and play
But I’ve made a choice and in my head is where she’ll stay
Even though the addict inside of me has something to say
I don’t let her speak, instead, I close my eyes and count until the urges go away
The better version of me is who I'm supposed to be
The better version of me is who I want people to see
But the addict inside of me tries with all her might
Refusing to accept defeat, she clings on to old memories and tries to fight
But the better version of me tears down the walls
My conscience has a way with words getting me to hear its calls
I clench my hands together, and squeeze my eyes shut tighter
Because I know the better version of me is a true survivor, a true fighter
The urges come and go and sometimes they last for a long while
And the addict inside of me tries to pull my strings but I fight back with a determined smile
I used to be a girl who depended on getting high
Until I realized one day, I could wake up as a spirit in the sky
So the addict inside of me has finally been put to rest
And although the urges come and sometimes kick me in my chest
I wake up every day knowing I’ve gotten a second chance
No more waking up to prepare myself for another devils dance
I fought to be who I am today,
and the addict inside of me no longer has anything more to say
Stephanie Davis
June 2021
-
Author:
StephanieAnn (
Offline) - Published: June 5th, 2021 01:02
- Comment from author about the poem: I am a recovering addict. I will be clean for 2 years come October 1st. I write about my addiction and my experiences only because I'm not afraid or selfish of where I came from and who I fought to be. I am very proud of the person I have become and I know through my words I can possibly help someone understand the desire to fight and obtain the will to fight. There is a different lifestyle out there in this modern world, we just have to fight for it, and trust me, the fight is worth it! WE DO RECOVER!
- Category: Unclassified
- Views: 15
- Users favorite of this poem: FallenAngel1🕊
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Comments3
I love this Steph. I work with people in recovery and they are some of the bravest and most determined human beings i know. Thanks for sharing.
Thanks for reading. This topic I tend to get personal with because I'm going to be the voice for those who can't be heard. I will not give up my sobriety and I want to assure people that it's worth it.
Thank you so much for reading this and leaving a comment!! I'm so happy to see that this poem still gets attention. Thank you so much.
Hi StephanieAnn. I remember reading and tagging this a favourite a while back. I’m sorry I wasn’t able to comment. It was a hard read for me. I’ve never been a hard addict. I smoke weed. But I’ve seen so many of my friends go down that road of hard drugs never to return. My sister and brother in-law had a ten year run down it. Thank goodness they turned around and came back. They’ve been clean for over 20 years now. I hope this only adds fuel to your strength.I apologize for not commenting sooner. Stay strong🌟🌹🌞🕊
Thank you. I'm sorry it was a hard read. I appreciate you reading it and commenting. I thank you sincerely for sharing your story. It truly does mean a lot to me.
I could really feel the positivity,strength and determination in your words. Thanks for sharing.🌟🤗🌹🕊🌞
Of course!! I also wrote one about my battle with fentanyl that has an encouraging ending.
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