Lost And Found...

Today once again begins a new & I'm still stuck in this rut that's making me blue...
But truth be told it's nothing new... Who knew...?
When will I know what to do...?
It's worse than ever before, I wish I had never walked though that front door...
I wish to handle it right, do what needs to be done & say goodbye once & for all to you, & get away  from all the nasty in you...
All these years was my inner voice that I thought was doubt & my insecurities lashing out...
Especially knowing that I was just as bad as you sometimes...
All the fighting & crying we put each other though...
I stood by the knowledge that if we didn't make it out the other side, we both only had ourselves to blame...
Either way I believed that we would lead to a better me, a better you...
How wrong, or how far gone was I...?
Why after fourteen years am I still tasting the same old tears...
What's the point in being soba if your telling me that it's all over...

I can't let you win, because I don't understand...

I found myself & lost my man...