My identity

I reread each text texted when you were texting her

My hand trembles and I look in the mirror 

And it's

that feeling when your body is rocking and you erupt

and it

seems like everything around you

is draining

I wish to melt into this room touching every crevice, licked upon

every corner 

So when you come here to apologize 

I trap you inside, like when I was eight and forced bees into jars

              (They always suffocated)

And in a tightly woven, claustrophobic grin

you kiss me 

A second

And you kiss me again

All of a sudden I'm shaking

Reborn and scared

Frozen, pale behind the blade of the door 

Everything you wanted me to be