IamUnicorn

Friend

My guard is up

I make a "friend"

Okay "sure"

Someone wants to be friends with "me"

No, I don't even want to be friends with me

Okay, a friend you seem

Friendly

Answer every call, every text

"I love you"

"You're awesome", "amazing", "beautiful"

I'm not

I know I'm not

Slowly I drop my guard

I have a friend

You're so nice

Is this what it's like to have a friend?

Slowly you fade

Stop answering calls, responding to texts

You're busy perhaps

Your life got crazy

No

You still answer

Just not to me

New friends 

As I fade

They will too one day

I've dropped my guard

I let myself hurt

Now you answer

"Life was crazy" you say

"I'm sorry" you say

I'm working on rebuilding my wall

It's still fragile

I believe you

You're being so nice

So trusting

Like the you I always knew

Then it happens again

I didn't finish building my wall so it easily fell

You didn't need to destroy it

I let it fall

I let my wall fall and now I'm defenseless

My raw heart hurting

I let this happen

"Friend"

Sure

I don't have friends

I won't have friends

I'm not even my own friend

Maybe I'm wrong

Maybe it's me

Friend?

I don't know anymore

Comments2

  • Doggerel Dave

    This about cyber friendships? Glad I'm not a part of it...

    Welcome to MPS.
    If you know the trials and perils of that world you could no doubt tell people like me mu ch I don't know, but there is much else in a big world too....

    • IamUnicorn

      It was about a friend I knew who moved away actually. Just far enough that most of our contact is mobile at this point. Mainly it's all in my head. Anxiety tends to pull me down the rabbit hole of doubt.

      • Doggerel Dave

        Good to know you are prepared to respond - this is what keeps MPS a lively place.

        With respect to all this your head and the rabbit hole - I know that feeling but would strongly advise a pivot in which you address the world.

        Aah I seem terribly formal here - I don't mean to be - apologies.

      • Accidental Poet

        It seems the most genuine of people are the ones who are not appreciated as they should be. Well penned Unicorn. 👍

        • IamUnicorn

          Thank you. ❤



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