One Last Night

One last night together

Is all I ask

To be loved and held again

In the way I used to be

I know you feel guilty

But it feels right to me

It felt like a first date

A first sleepover

Except this time

We knew how

To hold one another

Stolen kisses

Lots of hugs

Your phone vibrates

“Do you want to see who it is?”

You sigh

“Not really”

Disentangle yourself from me

And respond to your text messages

Begrudgingly

It’s about homework

Then you slide back into bed

Wrap me up in your embrace

A tangled mess of limbs once again

Wow

Maybe it’s just me but

It still feels like we’re in love

Perhaps its just that affection’s something

We’ve been deprived of

I hadn’t planned to stay over

But we just lost track of time

In the hours we talked

It’s not such a crime

I slip into your t shirt

And we brush our teeth

We crawl into bed

You hold me like you used to

I feel safe and secure

You kiss my cheek

I ask “are you comfy”

You say “no”

“Why not?”

“You’re turned away from me”

I flip over

Bury my face in your chest

You hold me close

One hand in my hair

The other resting on my lower back

We shift around often

Finding the best position

To snuggle in

You move me around so easy

I’m malleable in your hands

Our faces mere centimeters apart

You whisper to me

“This can’t happen again”

But Im not upset that it did

I made my own conscientious decision

I knew the consequences of my actions

You are not the bad guy

You are human like the rest

You have emotions, feelings, desires

And can act on them

Just like I do

Instead of feeling regret

In the morning we wake up

I check my phone

It’s 6am

“Do you want me to head home?”

You shake your head no

“We still have some more time together”

You pull me back into bed

Placing your lips

Against my forehead

We fall back asleep

Three hours pass

We check the time

“It’s 9am”

“Just five more minutes” you say

Its like you almost don’t want me to go

You scrunch up against me close

Hold my face in your palm

I wonder where it all went wrong

I can see the guilt in your eyes

You tell me you’re so sorry

You never meant for me to hurt this bad

But I don’t want your pity

Don’t look at me like I’m fragile

You threw me to the side

But I’m still here, not broken, but alive

We say our goodbyes

You give me one final kiss

To seal the deal

Of our ended relationship