the treatment is hell
everybody knows that
but here's your turn
your health, your time
what goes around
has come around
do or die, take the course
grin and bear it
until along comes
the body rejecting
all this chemical abuse
emergency help lines
give incorrect advice
adhering, places you
in wrong A and E
in wrong hospital
query after query
till 39.8 deg C
rings admission
alarm bells
where tiresome
shivvering hell ensues
with bodily functions
running wild
in understaffed
overbusy A and E
as somebody dies
outside
in an ambulance
waiting for your bed
(u find out later
in local news)
three wards later
nobody knows
whats wrong
wrong hospital
you should be
where your
treatment started
bodily functions
slow down
as neutropenia arrives
together with hospital's
resident chest infection
immune system defunct
chest burns
head pulses pain
temperature rockets
cough impairs inhaling
cannot inhale
2 a.m. alarm calls
oxygen.....
I.V. fluids burn in veins
needles, cannulars
antibiotics, pills
sleep, "let me...
stop waking me up"
time passes
you're fed up.
"breakfast -
which hot drink
would you like?"
Admitted 3rd Oct
ejected 20th Oct
with chest
still infected
nearly 3 weeks later
hoping to find a cure
for debilitating
breathlessness
it's left you with.
what you can't change
changes you
-
Author:
dusk arising (
Offline) - Published: November 7th, 2021 02:22
- Comment from author about the poem: Unsure about posting this but only one way to find out....... Neutropenia - Google has very technical descriptions but in lay man's terms it means your immune sytem collapses... common to about 50% of chemotherapy patients.
- Category: Unclassified
- Views: 66
- Users favorite of this poem: jarcher54, spilleronsheet.
Offline)
Comments8
Strong emotive words showing how hard it is in the NHS nowadays, the politicians could fix this but show no inclination of so doing.
Andy
Meanwhile the nation suffers.
I sympathise, though unable to empathise (deeper than sympathy), thankfully not having been in said situation.
Medicines and prayers (Christian healing ministry) going together? The latter seems less painful. Or as some say 'Give anything a try'.
Powerful Dusk. I can relate on much less drastic level with that experience you've just penned. Sadly, very true. Sadly.
Thanks SAxon, many of us have had suffering.
A haunt of a read showing the painful complexities of understaffed health service to such as yourself Dusk - - your grinning and bearing the needed treatment is a shining example to us all of your extra-courageous fight against Neutropenia - -- sending cuddles galore to our M.P.S. hero.........
I'm no hero Fay. My chemotherapy went wrong and I got directed to the wrong Hospital where my immune system failed and I then caught a nasty chest infection pneumonia.Unable to get that of my chest yet i thought i'd get this little tale off my chest instead. Thank you for your support and cuddles.
What - among other things - I would do if I were God.....
1. Fix Dusk
Thank you Lorna. Maybe I've been too big a sinner.
Covid sure changed everything, and definitely not for the best. I notice now they don't even mention the dead and dying, as if it's an inconvenience.
Having watched the brother-in-law getting sent home because of different hospitals mixing up drugs, I can relate to your write.
Thanks Paul. Chemotherapy is a savage treatment in all it's forms and does damage elsewhere as it battles the cancer. Positivity and faith are the strengths needed to endure.
Yes, chemo at anytime is savage, chemo during the lockdown must have been unbearable.
Glad you're keeping positive.
Unspeakable really dusk – though I’ll try.
A picture of a great health system under strain through inadequate funding – shocking suffering for you.
‘Tell you – very therapeutic would be to transfer your obvious writing skills into a complaint.
Worked for me – I progressed from the in-house complaints system to a Health Complaints Commissioner body to the appropriate MP (Minister of Health) to a full apology, an undertaking to clean up their practice from the CEO of the relevant health network. Took eight months , but was worth the effort. All after stuffed treatments resulted in a flu which became pneumonia followed by an opportunistic lung infection and an eight (coincidentally) week hospital stay.
I did a comprehensive letter of complaint about the goings-on in hospital during a stay i endured in 2018. Sent copies to three heads of dept to ensure it wasn't just binned. The response was typical of what you might expect from a huge organisation where the respondents are so far out of touch with the grass roots of the organisations purpose that they just turned the episode into an administrative challenge to find the most irrelevant excuses. My feelings about complaint today can be summed up in the phrase 'I can't be arsed'. I'm probably too unwell and a bit down at heart and frankly just want my health and vigour back.But thanks for the suggestion.
My sympathy and understanding goes out to you for the horrible experience at the hands of the health carers and the aftermath.
It's amazing what a post on MPS can draw from readers responses, a fine example in yours today.
Thanks DD.
Cheers – that’s OK dusk. Just a couple of quick clarifications.
My trouble occurred in another Australian state than my own, although the problem is pervasive. I am diabetic and for well over thirty years have controlled this with 2-4 shots of insulin a day which can vary plus some flexibility with diet. In hospital they take control of dosage and metering of blood sugar levels and stuff it up. High blood sugars result in lowered immune responses…..
Now while I well understand that you are crook (sick) and knackered at the moment, next time you may need to complain again: I’d not go horizontally - the buggers will shift the responsibility; go vertically – pick the biggest or most likely (in my case it was the complaints system to start) look at the response, pick holes and reply. Keep it going until you reach an impasse then move up to a higher authority - mine ended with the MP.
(As you well know – I can be a persistent bugger at times 😊 )
Above all take care of yourself.
Great work dear poet
It’s sad and most difficult to go through
It’s unimaginable about the pains of the treatment and the pain a person goes through
You laid it in the words so appropriate
Not been through the same pain
But covid too was painful
Can’t match up to the pains you suffered
But I can understand
It’s painful for the patient and their closed ones
Strength to all those and Leah God help them to get over it soon with less pain
It’s not easy to endure
Thank you Spilleronsheet (I'm going to call you 'spiller' henceforth unless you correct me).
I wanted to put some sort of record of my recent experience into words for my own future use. A lot of my poetry is about angles of my life experiences so that, on re-reading them myself, I am taken back to personal details of those times. An attempt at a buffer for anticipated memory fade in later years. Already chemotherapy has robed me of a lot of memory in it's well known 'chemo-brain'side effect.
The greatest asset any sufferer of cancer can bring to the table in an attempt to combat the disease is a positive mindset. Despite all the glitches I've experienced along the way I remain positive minded. I don't believe in a christian perception of a god figure but my spiritual beliefs are indeed a bolster to perseverance.
I have a lot to learn from you dusk ( I will call you that until you correct me) and yes dear fellow you can call me spiller
I am too clumsy so that suits me perfectly
It’s sad to read that you have gone through so much pain and sufferings
But hats off and cheers to you, you have won the hardest battle
I wish you loads of wishes for your future endeavours
And I agree we often forget and chemo has adverse effects
So do pen them please
I along with others would love to read
Would love to appreciate all colours you shade
With comedy we shall laugh together
To do beautiful scenes we shall watch together
To the worst times we shall comfort and heal together
To the bad lucks and grief we shall shout at heaven together
To the tough times we shall stand together
Thank you so much dear friend, you are an inspiration for me
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