A Numb Mess

My past is a mess,

My mind is a mess,

I am a mess. 

How did I get through it all?

How did I get this far? 

It feels almost impossible 

And I don't really know how to continue.

I want to cry 

I want to scream 

So...

My mind goes numb,

I cannot feel any emotions 

I will wait until the heaviness passes

Then I will allow myself to feel again,

But just how many more times must I do this to make it through?