After the Predators Poem, by Anna Colette, at My poetic side

Flashbacks keep continuing as most triggers still remain unknown

Some take a while to figure out

While during others the flashback dances through my head in an instant

I don't understand most of it, like why some triggers are triggers

As his image sometimes can't leave my head

And I am burdened once again with what the past held.

I feel like I still cannot truly comprehend what happened;

Mother was arrogant with her lies

Her husband was a predator dressed in sheep's clothing

He was a predator barely staying behind the psychopath line

I was a naive little girl, prey in their eyes

They slowly crept in.

Sometimes I still think it's my fault that everything happened,

Maybe if I hadn't been as naive

Maybe if I hadn't been so stupid

Maybe if I was smart enough

Maybe if...

I tear myself apart trying to explain what happened

When in reality, it's impossible to explain the motives of the predators

Were they bored?

Did they see my body as a new toy?

Was their life just not good enough that they had to take the past of mine?

I don't know if I'll ever understand, or forgive them

And trying to deal with this aftermath seems just as bad as if it were still happening.