It's Me

Mimie

It's You, It's You 

Yet again I put the blame on you 

You are the reason am here 

We said our goodbyes months ago 

Somehow I am overwhelmed by the pain now 

How long does the pain last 

How come when you left I was numb 

I thought it was progress

I hate how am questioning my sanity at this point

I thought I drank you out of my system 

A habit that made me puke my self-love

But somehow in my head, it felt like I was removing you from my system

Am now stuck in rehab because of you 

I wasn't hurt

I swear I was okay 

Alcohol was my silver lining

The feel-good feeling that blinded me when I didn't think of you when the alcohol hit

If it was your loss for losing me 

How come I am the one suffering

Stuck in this rehab alone to write my thoughts

It's you, you should be here 

You were my high 

With all the emotional rollercoasters you put me through

You touched me and injected me with your facade of kisses 

Making me believe that maybe I do miss you 

But I don't, It's You 

You just made it worse 

I found another victim, my wrist 

It called out to me every night I shed another tear for you

You are not worthy of love 

Am I not worthy of that love that I yearn so much for 

I can't do it 

I stare at my wrist again holding onto the pen I am using to vent my emotions

The words on the paper staring at me, meaningless 

Maybe a drop of blood will bring them to life 

But no It's you, why should I hurt myself 

I don't want to 

I am okay, I swear 

It's just that I wish you could feel how bad you made me feel 

Will you mourn for me hearing about my death

I doubt you moved on so easily 

Found a distraction 

You decided to leave but torture my thoughts

I don't want to feel like this 

I am putting the pen down 

I want to live 

Survive 

Really be okay 

I need help letting go 

Am scared because my identification has been attached to the pain

I won't know who I am without the pain

It's Me, I need to let go 

Remember myself and fall in love with my scars 

I will be fine 

I hope so

 

  • Author: Mimie (Offline Offline)
  • Published: December 9th, 2021 16:24
  • Comment from author about the poem: Battling with so much pain after holding on for far too long.
  • Category: Sad
  • Views: 44
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Comments +

Comments5

  • Paul Bell

    This is a tough poem that many can relate to. In the end, it's all down to you. Keep writing.

    • Mimie

      Every word I write gives me hope that maybe I will be fine. Thank you.

    • woundedheart

      Remember love yourself first has your own well being must always be foremost in your life. Powerfully penned poem

      • Mimie

        Self-love is hard to find especially at a point when you think all hope is lost. Thank you, I appreciate the feedback.

      • C E Thomas

        Incredible. Please write more, for the sake of us that can relate. Stranger, you've made me feel that I know you inside and out with your words. I have - and still - struggle with the things you've written here. From one blood-and-whiskey soaked person to another, I wish you all the best, and hope you find the peace that you deserve.

        • Mimie

          I wish us well and I appreciate the support. Hopefully, we will be fine.

        • Hanani

          Powerful and self reflective poem of the pain that we go through in process of letting go, if ever there's such a thing as letting go. But somehow we've got to find our peace, hope you find yours

          • Mimie

            Hopefully, I will find my peace. Thank you.

          • Rozina

            You WILL be fine. A powerful poem. Thank you.

            • Mimie

              Thank you for the support.



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