Bittersweet but Better Me

You stole my heart and you wrecked my head

Around your finger I was wrapped so you I did wed

Forsaken all others only you shall I bed

As you spooned out my heart and it was all I was fed

No passionate kisses nor life long wishes

No equality as our love was one sided

Breaking me down until our possessions we divided

My pride has been crumbled while under your breath you did mumble

You lied when I asked what you just said

You broke my trust and you broke my bed

The worst pain I've ever felt was in the heart that is barely still beating Just under my head

Was my love a game and my emotions your toys

Or did you find something better in some other boys

I didn't think I would grow to love another again

Yet I received pity from a dear friend

Although it faltered also my heart it did mend

Your promiscuity deserves some gratuity

For I have found love in myself if only just for now

I'm looking deep inside myself 

further down than ever before

I've pulled out feelings that I've never felt

Of that much I am sure

I'm grabbing words and writing them down

Trying to make it all make sense

This new me that I found

You caused a revolution in my very soul

Ever since I climbed up out of the hole

Hitting bottom was simple and I know that now

The climb was grueling yet I endured 

even took time to wipe my brow

Looking inside at the mess you did make

Finding that the heartstrings they bend so they won't break

I'm a new man now and no longer naive

I'll never give myself again fully this you should believe

Maybe not all clouds have a silver lining

but this one sure did

I tucked my weakest faults way down inside 

And now that's where they're hid

No one else will ever reach them 

They are reserved just for me

Do I even care to hold another again

This we shall see

I'm fully healed now 

In only 5 years time

Yet I'm still not sure of the crime

Who would have guessed 

Not the tar heroin not the cocaine 

But isolation is what did me the best

I'll always despise you 

Through this year and the rest

Don't call me don't write me 

just leave me alone

Just allow me to live 

and you can stay gone