now everything
tastes of drugs
and i am tainted
polluted by saviour
as cheemo rules
my body and brain
befuddled with no memory
overbalancing, vomiting
stumbling, staring, sleeping
ah yes sleep takes my days
onto strange beds
in clinical wards
a land of anyone else
but mine
where is mine
where is my mind
where is my life and hope
and all i want is to goto work
where i do good
people like me
and i'm not a burden
on this sickbed of sorrows
like a total waste of space
-
Author:
dusk arising (
Offline) - Published: December 24th, 2021 03:51
- Comment from author about the poem: memories of chemotherapy in 2019 and 2021
- Category: Unclassified
- Views: 31
- Users favorite of this poem: L. B. Mek, spilleronsheet
Offline)
Comments7
You are not a waste of space dus,k,your work is a welcome read anytime
I was a waste of space mid therapy in 2019 when i wrote this. Thank you Blue Orchid
Why did you need chemotherapy,if you don't mind my asking
Cancer has taken hold of my family too
For a cancer in 2019 which returned in 2021.... cancer is everywhere.
I'm sorry, that has got to be hard.what kind of cancer,I consider you a friend, even though we had some problems, is it okay if I pray for you
Blue, I dont have a problem with you or your partner as people. I do have many comments to make about the christian stuff he posts. Not because i don't believe in god (whatever god is) but becuase christianity fails to answer important questions and you partner has taken offence to me asking those questions.
My cancer is oesophagal cancer. Several people on here pray for me and I am quite OK with people doing as they wish to follow their own beliefs so long as they dont preach those beliefs to me.
Ok dusk,I totally respect you and your outlook on God,I get it,I really do.
I will keep you in my thoughts and prayers my friend.
Dion q means we'll,he is simply sharing the gospel, hoping to reach someone who needs or wants help.he has had a hard life, going down a really bad road, until someone reached out to him,and his life took 180, completely turning his life around.he wants o do the same thing for someone else.
I hope you understand a little more about him and his wanting to pay forward the Joy he found with God, besides I love him,he can't be that bad can he?(hahahahaha)
I’m sorry you had to go through that. And that your having to go through chemo again ()
After my body rejected chemo in sept / oct theyve taken me off it. Hope to be on a new regieme in new year.
Yes , I hope something else helps you .
My father is going through this right now so found this piece very touching and heart wrenching, you captured this wonderfully. Merry Christmas 🎅
It can feel very lonely if people wont let you share what youre going through so make sure you talk to him about the nitty gritty of treatment and how its effecting him. Talking about what youre all going to do as a family once treatment has been recovered from is very important too if thats appropriate.
Merry christmas to you and yours.
I have no words, to appease or attempt to ease the suffering
you're fighting through, dear Poet
but if I may, let me remind you
of all the comments and praise
your Poetry, has gifted you
this year,
words of thanks, for sharing
your insight and wisdom
and helping, so many
glean a little more understanding
about life
or giving them, lifeline that escape
even for just a few, treasured minutes
lost, engrossed
in your poetic genius..
(so no, I refute your last line
wholeheartedly
as a 'waste of space', wouldn't
be deserving of all the love you receive!)
Stay strong, dear Poet
in those Timeless words
of Dylan Thomas:
'Do not go gentle into that good night,
Old age should burn and rave at close of day;
Rage, rage against the dying of the light.
Though wise men at their end know dark is right,
Because their words had forked no lightning they
Do not go gentle into that good night.'
I'm very familiar with those words of Dylan Thomas (I used to recite them in a piece of music my group performed).
This piece was written in 2019 and describes how i felt in the worst days of chemo/radiotherapy. I'm not going to be on chemo again until the new year so at the moment i'm relatively quite well. The waste of space line is a hint of negativity of spirit creeping in to an otherwise very positive attitude.
Thank you for your very considered comments LBM.
Dear Dusk
No words can reduce the pains that you went through
Still I would like to say, your warrior
With so much pain engulfed your pen radiates hope, strength and gives the vibe to fight the dark pains and the difficult days
With great insights, you make us look at world with opportunities
I learn a lot from the poetic words you craft
Sir your work is exemplary and no waste of space
Such refinement can never be compared
Thanks for making us read to such deep meanings and beautiful insights
The true reality that world lives in
And teaching us the word ‘gratitude’
I can’t imagine how tough it is to face such harsh pains
Big cheers from my side
You have overcome the pains in past
And you will do it again
Your a winner sir
Thank you spiller, youre very kind. There's nothing brave or corageous in putting up a fight when the alternative is to die my friend. I was always in a positive mindframe dealing with chemo's side effects but yes some negative feelings would creep in for a short while when i was feeling sorry for myself thoroughly worn down by drugs. I shall be on chemo again next year though a different regieme.... lets see whay it brings out in me LOL.
All will be surely well
Your lines “Do or die “ gives me huge strength
Best of luck dear Dusk
Your mind will return soon and all will be wonderful d a.
Andy
I'm OK at the moment Andy. This piece was written in 2019 in the thick of it.
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