Alone

Alone. Loneliness. Isolation. We’re never really alone though, always flustered by our thoughts making sure to not forget the fact that, in the world we are. As if every thought was the annoying song always skipped on your playlist, but kept on repeat because at one point you actually liked it. Or at least you told yourself that. Being alone, some love it. Some use to. Some will. But I don’t. At least not now, I used to like it a lot. I used to be alone, but now I’m alone with my thoughts. It’s different.

I want to be alone, or alone with you. Alone with someone I crave to be with. Someone whose presence brings light to my eyes, but without them, my eyes are shrouded with clouds of darkness.

Someone that I love. Someone that loves me. Someone.

Someone that loves me like no one ever before. Someone who watches me like the sun, when it sets down on my city. Slowly peeking over the edge to make sure that every being gets one last glimpse of its warmth before knowing they will be plunged into the cold darkness that follows. Praying they will outlive the night, but when it rises brings the warm winds that breathe air into the souls who couldn’t sleep the night. Or couldn’t stop sleeping for that matter. Someone that craves to be with me as much I do when they’re not beside me. Knowing that I long for their presence in my bed, reaching out every night trying to feel for their soul that watches while I sleep, only to know that I will never know. Reaching out only to hear a vibration, a text, from someone who's also awake and craving your presence in this dark night and makes it known even when you thought they wouldn’t. When the fire inside you is withering because of natural destruction through time, but that someone doesn’t show up to your house with flowers or chocolate, but with a lighter because they know. They know. They know what you need. They know who you are. They know.

Knowing. But will someone ever know me like that? Know me the way best friends know each other in films, the way parents know their children. The way people know the sun will rise after a cold dark night, the way astronauts know the earth will always be there when they return from their adventure. But each of these knowings are different. But they are also the same.

The same way I know nobody can ever love me like that. 

Alone.