I'm in rehab,

learning to lose self-sabotaging addiction.

I've been here for a few months now.

I've relapsed a few times.

Tried to run away from healing a few times.

Until each pain-filled event led me back. 

I've learned how to fight cravings.

I go on runs to cleanse my body and soul.

I still have withdrawals.

Nights and mornings,

I shiver and rock back and forth.

sweating and letting tears pour out of my eyes.

I can't stop screaming.

But I hold myself through this.

knowing it will pass,

and I will be clean.

The day comes and I've overcome the withdrawals.

But when it creeps up

yelling, "you're all alone" 

I go and cleanse my body and soul.

I bathe in the wind,

and I am welcomed back home.

As the sky cries,

and the plants sweat and tremble,

mother earth lets me know I am no longer alone.

as I never was.

This is my retreat.

She sings to me and sends me small angels.

And I find that inside of myself, and outside of myself

I am free.




  • Author: carolina (Offline Offline)
  • Published: March 8th, 2022 18:43
  • Comment from author about the poem: this poem is about mental illness and learning how to take care of yourself through it. You'll find through my other writings; the earth is a big part of my healing. I hope this resonates with someone and if not, I hope you enjoyed it
  • Category: Spiritual
  • Views: 23
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  • Milind Gautam

    loved it

  • aburmeister

    I am also a runner and am relating to your words and poetry towards the middle. Nature is one of the best things and running such a lifeline! “A retreat” and “bathe in” “small angels”…perfect!

    • carolina

      yes !!! i’m so glad you connect to this 🙂

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