My Reflection

 

I never understood

Until this moment now

What I was worth

And so much how

 

It seemed and felt

I didn't matter much

All things conflicting

Words, actions and such.

 

I allowed them to change

How I felt about me

And this person now

I didn't use to be.

 

The way I was watched

Was enough to disturb

But felt that was wrong

So this feeling I curbed. 

 

The feeling never left

I choked it down

Hoping it would leave

If it didn't I could drown. 

 

Little did I know

That tolerating became

A slippery slope an

Animal I couldn't tame.

 

I know I'm not perfect

My flaws are plenty

Surely though I'm not

Completely empty

 

Of love and kindness

And integrity

I do have these qualities

I just couldn't see

 

Them in my reflection

The sight hard to swallow

Words, opinions, actions

Sent me to wallow

 

In misery of how

Myself I viewed

Til that day I thought

That this is askewed.

 

I will no longer take

All of the blame

This girl's getting back

Into her own lane. 

 

I don't expect easy

I know I'll be sad

I'm sure I'll break things

Being conflicted and mad.

 

Then one day I'll notice

That I'm doing fine

Getting reacquainted

With me and the kind

 

Of person I used to be

Who loves with no break

This is not a weakness

Make no mistake.