A Golden Ocean Anchorage

Rocky Lagou

“Lord,

You know my wrongs,

Wipe the tears off the hopeless sailor –

And command the ship back to the port...at last.”

 

Mother,

You know I left the light on intentionally, right?

 

I heard a soft rattle coming from inside,

So, I decided to step in.

 

I found myself – crawling on the floor –

I hadn’t learned how to walk yet –

 

But I saw you in the room,

And I also saw you out the room –

In the porch… lighting your unholy cigarettes,

In the nighttime light – once more.

 

It’s probably what led to your cancer –

Old habits die hard I guess.

 

But mom – I saw you,

In the room.

 

With your golden hair –

Illuminating the atmosphere...

And the sea of yellow unfolded all the mysteries of the world.

 

The glimmering light flickered on my innocent face

And I – was a captain –

I maneuvered the ship through the treacherous waters

And I embarked on a voyage to enlightenment.

 

The curls of the waves engulfed me in

The thrust and the shove and the whip of the wind –

 

Only, I was at the helm.

 

I wasn’t accustomed to leadership –

I didn’t even realize the pitfalls lurking in the depths

Of the amber abyss.

 

But I – was hands on wheel.

 

So I dragged the wheel starboard

And the keel splashed with the foamy tide

And I – was one with the drive.

 

The lightning strikes lit the darkness,

And the winds were releasing a sigh.

So the stern gave a wobble

And the masts were unsure of their strength

 

But the sails continued to fly –

 

And the golden embers of the sea were alight

With a bubbling sense of discernment.

 

Through a bare and endless horizon –

The yellowness seemed to shine.

 

But how can it be when the Father Ship

Sailed away from harbor?


How can it be when the Mother Ship crumbled

Into the sorrowing sea?

 

How can it be that a sea can glow,

Despite the one in the boat being an...

 

Unconfident, fearful, timid bag of bones?

 

But see,

I discovered,

That in order to command a boat in a raging ocean,

You have to learn to anchor yourself first.

 

My whole life I expected others to be the anchor,

To be the firmness and courage that I couldn’t grasp.

I thought that resting assured on another –

Would bring me closer to myself – but I was wrong.

 

And with that,

The golden sea began to roll itself back onto the scalp

Of my mother.

 

And the little me picked up a toy ship –

And began to play.

 

So I took one last glimpse at the scene:

My mom on the sofa admiring the child.

 

I think she knows,

That I left the shining sea on intentionally.

 

And I carefully stepped back and closed the door.

 

But I had made sure to rip a piece of the sail before I left –

 

And decided to make it into a canvas.

  • Author: Rocky Lagou (Offline Offline)
  • Published: April 11th, 2022 10:48
  • Comment from author about the poem: Wow. After writing this I kind of feel a relief. The funny thing is that I went into writing this with a completely different intent to what would be the result, but I'm so glad that it turned out how it did. Know that no matter what's happened in your life, you can always guide your ship back to self. Hope you enjoy! 🌊🟑
  • Category: Reflection
  • Views: 27
  • Users favorite of this poem: Bella Shepard, spilleronsheet, Christina8, theneophiles_words
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Comments8

  • Bella Shepard

    Dear Rocky, I'm sighing as I read, for the beauty of your words. I think I'm glimpsing the child, dependent on the all comforting, all loving mother, "the sea of yellow unfolding all the mysteries of the world" and yet the child, at some point must become the all encompassing self. The mother always being a piece of that self. A true gem of a poem.

    • Rocky Lagou

      Hello dear Bella! This truly means a lot to me. This poem represents a myriad of things to me, but mainly, it's a coming of age. The sensation of losing grip from that childhood self and having to face a new world with responsibilities and hardships is honestly quite tumultuous. The representation of my mother's hair as a golden sea is also a reference to the fact that I will forever have her in my memories, that's why I begin the poem with, "Mother, / You know I left the light on intentionally, right?" and end in, "I think she knows, / That I left the shining sea on intentionally." It's to hint at the fact that although I've grown into the person I am now and have sort of lost grip with my upbringing, she was a pivotal influence on my life which wouldn't have been possible if weren't for her. So her light will forever be "on" in my mind. The other side of the metaphor is that the golden sea is the journey we must all face in order to become firm in self and not reliant on others. So though it seems scary or difficult, we must all plant our anchors in ourselves, and not others. Thanks a bunch Bella for taking the time to read and leave an encouraging comment. I truly appreciate it! Have a wonderful day!

    • spilleronsheet

      Loose thyself in your mother’s arm
      There she holds me to protect
      But one day i must step out
      Step out from the veil of her shadow
      Cause the sky awaits my flight

      I could feel the strong bond between mother and child
      The evolution of a child into adulthood
      And the independence and responsibility one needs to shoulder upon
      A beautiful imagery portraying the most loveable relationship
      Very well inked dear Rocky

      • Rocky Lagou

        Hello Spiller! It's truly such a joy to see you around. That strong link between mother and son was definitely one I wanted to highlight in this piece and it feels great to see you felt that. I wanted to express the notion that despite someone's past, there is still possibility to rearrange the pieces you have to create a brighter future. "In order to command a boat in a raging ocean, / You have to learn to anchor yourself first," this line is probably the main idea of the poem and everything else centers on this. I also reference the departure of my father during my childhood and the passing of my mother with the lines, "But how can it be when the Father Ship / Sailed away from harbor? / How can it be when the Mother Ship crumbled / Into the sorrowing sea?" Life will truly throw a lot at you, but you must always be firm in your position. Thanks abundantly for taking the time to read and respond with a beautiful message. Have a lovely day! 🌊✨

        • spilleronsheet

          A very inspiring poetry dear Rocky, thanks for sharing….

        • Dahlia

          beautifully expressed your sage soul shines through, what wonderful wisdom you painted here, may life continue to bring you all that is your truest purpose!
          Dahlia βœŒπŸ’–

          • Rocky Lagou

            Hello Dahlia! Your kindhearted remarks are truly appreciated! This poem centers on coming of age and finding a sense of leadership within one's self, as I feel that many are playing the "following" role and continue to be influenced by corrupt leaders globally. I also wanted to slightly hint at writing, especially writing poetry, with the final lines, "But I had made sure to rip a piece of the sail before I left – / And decided to make it into a canvas." There's a lot to uncover in this piece and I truly delight to see you enjoyed it. May you have a great day! πŸ’•πŸŒŠ

          • Neville



            you have written here what I long to do & feel ........................................ N

            • Rocky Lagou

              Thank you kindly Neville! It's really appreciated! I pour my heart into my poetry and it's nice to see you felt the piece!

            • Christina8

              Rocky, this is beyond words. So intimate and one of self discovery. "My whole life I expected others to be the anchor," And comforting images of your mother with the sea of yellow. I just don't have the words, honestly, to review this art piece.----Christina

              • Rocky Lagou

                Hi dear Christina! I really wanted to express the journey to finding self via a unique and vivid analogy, so by transforming my mother's hair into a large yellow sea and I, the speaker, being the captain of this sea it truly goes to show that we are the ones who dictate our outcome. We shouldn't live in this comfortable space where we expect others to always work in our good, but rather we should embrace our own ability to lead and rely more on our instincts. Thanks so much for such kind remarks! Have a wonderful day!

              • dean langmuir

                Rocky,Keep leaving your shining sea on,take care.

                • Rocky Lagou

                  Thanks a bunch Dean! I will always have my mother in the back of my head, she really made me who I am today! Have a lovely day!

                • Rozina

                  Thank you for sharing this very meaningful beautiful poem. Mothers love unconditionally. We hope that whatever we shared and taught and bonded and loved with our sons and daughters will help to light their paths and ease their burden at some point in their lives.

                  • Rocky Lagou

                    Exactly. A mother's role in a child's life is completely pivotal for that person's development. Their effect on us is so beautiful and I cherished every moment I had her with me. Thanks for your time and have a lovely day!

                  • theneophiles_words

                    This poem is a remarkable spectacle of that close-knitted tender bond.
                    The line 'You have to learn to anchor yourself first' is engaging. We forget such a simple thing and get carried away with every other thing, and when you said, 'and decided to make it into a canvas'; it showed no matter what life tosses us into, it's our steadiness and decisiveness that will help us sail throw it. Astonishing!😊✨

                    • Rocky Lagou

                      Thank you ever so much! This poem means various things to me but I feel it represents that sense of growing out of that childhood self and into maturity. It can be pretty scary facing the "real world," but when we learn to rely on our own value then we can surely triumph. Also our influences, like family, teach us a lot along the way. Have a lovely day!



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