I hate how I feel
things that happen is so unreal
It went from a gentle warm touch
To being disappointed and a fuss.
to raising insecurities
then turning around and feeling a fist
The damage a relationship could cause
Wishing God would erase it all
How can this be?
Does he know what he means to me?
Do you really feel I deserve this?
Become a victim to a narcissist
I could never explain how much the relationship brought me so much pain
In the end, still wanting to love him again
Realizing everything that I was starting to hate
Was a man who was making the biggest mistake
Hours, days, weeks, months, and years
moments that were fill with tears
Feelings turned from what I once felt was love
Until I wish I didn't know him at all
I was filling myself with hate
Wishing I would walk away
Drinking alcohol
and doing drugs
just to numb the pain
so, I couldn't feel nothing at all
Having relations
just to ease the frustrations.
Is he in control of my life?
Or is my mind on a vacation?
I was losing myself
Wishing I could find someone to just help
Isn't there a therapist
That can help and despair a sis?
How many sessions would it take?
just to make the pain erase.
Erase from my memories
and realize he was just an enemy.
-
Author:
Butterflymoments (
Offline) - Published: April 18th, 2022 21:40
- Comment from author about the poem: I wrote this poem from a painful experience. I was in a long-term relationship that left me choosing between love and myself. I battle the memories I once had with him from the reality of the relationship. I have been on my healing journey since ending the relationship and I found writing as a way to express myself and the moments of experience. I hope anyone who is battling a relationship with domestic violence understand that there is a way to break free and you must trust yourself to let go.
- Category: Reflection
- Views: 24
Offline)
Comments2
Every single word has touched my heart. It's amazing how we can turn our pain into art. Keep writing 💘
Thank you. I will continue to write since it is helping me to express my feeling through the healing journey. I hope my poems find someone that needs to know that there are not alone.
in both your intent and execution
your poetry's empathy and steadfast, bravery
shines illuminatingly, bright..
what a profoundly humane, endeavour
may it yield you, the peace of mind you crave
thank you! for choosing to share
dear Poet
Thank You. I started writing in my teens. It has been a while. I recently started writing again to express myself as part of the healing. It has been hard to discuss the traumatizing events over the years. Writing has started to bring me peace.
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