Upon a Rock

Upon a Rock

 

How do you hide 

a crushed and broken heart?

For years you sit at the bar

downing drinks and throwing darts.

 

Play the sad songs on the Juke

but don’t ever dance. 

Get asked out for dates, but decline.

No sense taking another chance.

 

Complain about your life, endlessly.

When they ask how you’re doing

say your heart’s a raging sea

of agony and misery.

 

When your doctor says to exercise

tell him that you’ll try.

Then get a large coke and a large fries

to go with your pizza pie.

 

Let your body go to flab.

Add some poundage to your waist.

Fill it with alcohol, sugar, and fat

until your knees must be replaced.

 

When you’re having trouble breathing

blame it on pollution.

When you can’t stand up without wheezing

tell them a drink’s the only solution.

 

Keep your promise to the E.R. Doc

Go to the gym every day. Just don't go in.

Cross the street to the Pub where the locals flock

and order a Sapphire Bombay Gin.

 

By this time, you’ll be fifty-four

and the girl who broke your heart

will be in her third divorce…

 

Here’s to Cupid and his darts!