Marion and Ronnie

Marion and Ronnie.

 

“It’s been a lot of years” said Marion to Ron

 And although  we're in our seventies, you still turn me on.

“Let’s have an early night, let’s love without duress.”

“Don’t wear your khaki Y fronts, your darker briefs are best”.

 

A night of love and passion, we’ll rock around the clock.

“Wear that stringy vest.” she said. “ And Man United socks.”

“ I want to live a little, Abandon all our cares.

“You can ride the Stannah, and chase me up the stairs.

 

Ron was apprehensive about that kinda stuff.

The last time that he tried it, he just got out of puff..

His arms were not as strong, he was weaker in the hips.

Could she not just settle for a plate of fish and chips ?

 

Marion was determined to have a steamy night.

She did n’t want to argue, she did n’t want to fight

Ron was sympathetic and said if she agrees’

He’d buy the fIsh and chips and throw in mushy peas.

 

Ronnie said that too much sex gave him indegestion.

He was getting quite alarmed at his lovely wife’s suggestion.

He said that it  upset him to stand and watch her beg.

But if she called a truce, he would add a pickled egg!

 

“And if we’re talking seafood.” Ronnie then explained.

An older man’s desires often tend to wane.

“It's a bit like hunting lobster, when you're too close to the shore.

I think mi brain’s forgotten, what mi winkle’s for.”

 

Then Marion reminded him of when they were in their teens.

He was so adventurous,amorous and keen.

She said “You used to bite me, to really turn me on.

Ron replied he would oblige but all his teeth had gone.”

 

Ron said many years ago, his passion knew no curb.

But nowadays  his motto is. Please do not disturb. 

“And if that’s the sort of Monkey business, you wanting to begin.

I’ll have to pop tut bathroom and put mi dentures in.”

 

Marion was furious that Ron had lost his spark

She longed for nights of passion of cuddles in the dark

She said she’d get a lodger in to satisfy her lust.

Ron said “ Can I have one too ,but with a bigger bust?”

 

Marion was livid and in the paper put an ad

For a live in lover, a Gigolo or CAD

This upset old Ronnie and made him rather blue.

“If she was to take a lover,” he would have one too

 

He knew the kind of lady he wanted to move in.

A buxom sort of wench, tall and not too thin.

 He said “ If Marion’s  decided not to love me anymore.

There’s no way that I’m buying fish and chips for four !”