I Will Win This War

It feels as though a huge chunk of me is missing

I feel hurt, pain and anguish

I keep procrasinating and spending time reminiscing

Why can't I be in a fairytale so I can just vanish it away with a genie's wish

Leave me alone because in a matter of time I'll be branded 'insane'

I want to kill you but I am unable to put a bullet to your head because in order to do that, I would sacrifice myself instead

It feels like you are constantly ruining me, taking away my conciousness and consuming or even eating my brain

It's as though you are committing cannibalism but only in my head

So why do I allow your beastly words to cause myself a strain?

I believe I will eventually put you to bed

After all, all you are is a parasite in my brain

Your malicious words start a war against  the electric fighting spirit arising  from my heart

I'm afraid of your voice but I have a war to win

I need to prove that I can fight, that I am here to battle; not to fall apart

I hope one day I won't need to dream about true happiness and confidence, maybe one-day I might even become comfortable in my skin

Although it is going to take baby steps but this is the start