Ditch of Despair

I'm upset, I'm hurt, I'm misunderstood

It's a lonely and horrible feeling to be

abandoned, ridiculed, judge by others

connections all around

but knots and tangles obstruct my-

my friendships

relationships

and colleagues.

People are trying to break me

Exploiting my openness

My filterless aesthetic,

Exploiting my insecutrities.

The void in my soul

a ditch 

I keep getting trapped

Trapped

trapped in a cave, crushing in.

Gasping for breath

Seeking the light

Needed fresh air

Drowning in a pit of suffocation and desperation

She pulled the trigger

snatched me by the back of the head

A face plant to my past

A bullet of words, a curve ball --

caught by my childhood abuser

thrown back at my face.

Invisible bruises

Invisible scars

tattooed, branded to my soul -

Tattoos on my forehead

warning people

steering people away

steering me on a path 

back to the ditch of despair and lonliness.