conception

Regret, Fear, Shame,

Worry, Rejection,

Care is rewarded with guilt

Gilded with worry

Glamorized with affection.

The regret of knowledge 

“Ignorance is bliss”

Translated to 

Know as little as possible if you do not want to be changed.

Listen with caution

Feel with fear.

Know the consequences of 

understanding.

Feeling 

Live up to the storyline 

Follow it 

Breaking 

Guilt for yourself 

For preferably 

For attraction

For needs

For wants

For peace

Stop.

Leave me alone.

Let me think, I need time.

I don’t understand my reaction 

So unlike me. 

But what am I like?

What makes me important?

Stop. 

It’s so familiar

This feeling of unsatisfaction.

Of remorse

I am to blame?

For myself?

“You had no wrongdoings”

But I am

“To blame”

What do they feel?

How do I make up for unrequited love?

How do I fix it?

“You don’t”

“Why?”

“Because you can fix their perception of you.

You can distort it, but you will always haunt them” 

Stop.

I didn’t ask for this.

“Lucy misfortune”

“Suffering from success”

Stop.

Successes shouldn’t hurt, 

Cutting from a knife.

Tightness in your chest.

Testing your loyalty, 

Stop it.

Stop it right now. 

I can’t handle it.

I can’t take the 

responsibility.

Incompetent.

Tired.

Stop.

Overstimulation.

I can’t feel anymore.

Terror.

Stop. Stop it, I said Stop. 

End it please.

I beg of you. 

Stop.